Life Taken For Granted

She's really gone..

  I sat in the pew, and stared up. The preacher talked for a while, I didn't tune him out, but I wanted it to be over. I didn't want to hear this anymore, but I didn't want to go home. I looked around, people were sobbing, sniffling, and listening closely to the preachers every word. I looked to my right, Miles. His green tear stained eyes, focused on the casket. I patted his back, and leaned over, nudging his arm. He looked at me, pure sadness in his eyes. "I'm sorry." I said to him.
  "It'll be alright, she's up there." He pointed to the ceiling, with a teary smile. My heart sank. I closed my eyes, and let it all out. There was nothing I could hold back. I was screaming, and fighting whoever was trying to escort me outside. I fell to my knees, my fingers gripped the dark purple carpet. I hit the floor multiple times with the side of my closed fist, screaming no over and over again. Someone pulled me up once again, I could this time see that it was Miles. He walked me out into the sanctuary, and closed the door. I dropped to my knees, and fell back against the wall, bringing my knees up, and uncontrollably crying. He sat down in front of me, patting my shoulder.
  "Britni.... Mom. Its gonna be alright, I promise okay?" His voice cracked and I found myself crying, still.
  "Hey, I said its gonna be okay, we'll figure this out, and we'll get through this together, its just you and me now, don't leave or let me lose you too. Come on Britni. We have to pull ourselves together, and get back in there. For her. Our Guardian."
I shook my head okay, and stood up. Before we went back in, I grabbed a paper towel from the bathroom, and blew a river out of my snot filled nose. Miles giggled, and got a smile out of me.
  "One more hour to go kid." He said.