Love and lust

Chapter 1

Sam is sleeping deeply, Dean looked at the clock, there were few hours already since he is trying hard to fall asleep but without success, today he saw Cas many more times than from the day he returned from purgatory - or he thought he sees him on a roadside, in the back seat in the rear view mirror, behind him when he looked in a showcase, now he lie on his stomach in bed, fully clothed, with wide eyes glued to the window when ....Cas.....right outside the window. He jumped to his feet and sprang out the door without making too much noise.. Softly called out "Cas - Cas – is that you? Are you here? Show yourself! Please!" ... Dean was begging trying to pierce his eyes through the night and through the heavy rain.. "Please tell me you're here ..." a fluttering of wings for a moment and the image of Cas appeared just in front of him. He reached out to touch him and Cas vanished.

"Please Cas! Have mercy!" Dean was now thinking aloud: "Is killing me thinking that you're not here, that you might be dead, I miss you, I do not know to express what I feel exactly but I have a huge hollow in my soul and I cannot enjoy life without you around, I need you!" Through heavily cheered rain yet he heard the known fluttering of wings and Cas materialized right in front of him...
"Dean ..... I don't have much power to stay visible, I heard you calling me, praying, talking to me ... I tried hard to be seen and heard but I was very weak". Cas is already surrounded by Dean's vigorous arms while his face is buried in Cas's neck, his lips touching his skin .. Cas shudder seized by a unknown feeling but instinctively responded to Dean's tight embrace.. The rain is watering them both but their embrace seems endless, Dean's hair touches his face, fills his nostrils with a thrilling woody fragrance that sends shivers through his body and involuntarily kissed Dean's hair. Dean leaps and breaks the hug realizing how glued was against Castiel and how intimate is the hypostasis, believing that the kissing was just an impression..
"Buddy, I cannot believe" Dean swept his gaze and almost involuntarily his hands on Cas's face, head, chest, stroking, feeling, wanting to be sure it is real.. They look at each other with love and sent through their glances everything that cannot be uttered. Cas's piercing blue eyes were sinking in Dean's emerald eyes and his heart drummed madly inside. Dean head was coming in slow motion until almost come to be touching foreheads.. The rain stopped, the air in the little space left between their faces is palpable, vibrating..
"I missed you" says Dean with a hoarse voice.. "I know" whispered Cas. Dean was even closer to his face, his head leaning to one side with slowness and deposited a kiss on his lips, its eyes become bigger and amazed while Dean's closed in an overwhelming feeling and continue to explore Cas's lips. In seconds he parted his lips with his tongue and begin to kiss him tenderly and deeply until he felt Cas responsive to his kiss and both lose themselves in a passionate ravishing kiss that was darkening their thoughts and that none of them wanted to break.
When Dean's hands have cupped his face, Cas grabbed his waist and pulled him against his body, both wet with rain responding to each other touches, overwhelmed by sensations never experienced before, lost in an endless kiss promising sensations that will change their lives forever..

Chapter 2

"Damn it Castiel – what are you doing to me? Was this a good time to disappear?" Dean whispered in the silent of the night when he heard a noise behind and saw the door opening and Sammy coming out of the room.
"Are you OK Dean?"
"Sure...just came out for some fresh air. I'm going to bed now, was a long day. See you in the morning".
"It is 5 a clock in the morning" - smirked Sam.
"Ok then – see you later"
"We should hit the road Dean if we want to be in our new home by this evening - the Men of Letters' Bunker is in Kansas, that's what? At least 10 hours' drive."
"Ok let's go then"
Was 7PM when they reached the location and after a house tour and a quick shower each headed to their rooms. Their private rooms for the first time in...ever. Dean fell asleep with a smile on his face remembering the night before, Cas's touches and his taste; cinnamon and vanilla mix and the softness of his lips and the texture of his tongue. Good night Cas- murmured Dean right before the lights went out.. Suddenly the felling of another presence in the room made him reach the knife under his pillow, always prepared for the worst.. The bunker was safe and protected so no demon could ever enter it. Then what? In the dim light he saw Castiel in the armchair next to the bed watching him..
"Hello Dean"
"Damn Cas, I could have killed you!"
"You couldn't – your knife is not killing angels" says seriously Castiel. "I heard you saying good night to me and I wanted also to ask your forgiveness for leaving in such a hurry" faintly Cas says "I knew Sam is coming outside last night and I didn't want him to ..you know .. I got here in a split second but you're already sleeping".
"Why you didn't wake me up and.. wait! what? ...you're here since then ? What you did in the meantime?"
"I just sit here – waiting – watching you sleep, but..." and Cas sweeps his glace over Dean's bear chest ..."I have to admit I was so tempted to lay next to you"
"By all meanings ...be my guest" said Dean with a smile tapping on the bed.. All clothed Cas was lying down not sure what to do next.. After few moments of silence Dean took charge: - "Loose the damn tie, and the trench coat...and the rest..." and both started to take off layers of his clothes until Cas remained in a pair of white shorts, and awkwardly hard from Dean's touches while he was helping him to strip.. Dean kneed on the bed, wearing only sweatpants, his hands on his knees while looking at Cas's body contemplating with great pleasure of what is now nearly naked in front of his eyes
"You know Cas – I was never and I mean – never ever attracted to a man, so all these feelings that are building up inside me are unfamiliar, freaking scary, and are eating me alive. I was in denial but every time you look at me, every time you touch me, my heart is pounding and there's a fire in my veins that cannot be controlled and sweet God all I want is to get the touches, the feel of you...any part of you, against me ..any part of me." "Damn it Cas" – said Dean leaning in bed on his side with his hand on Cas's chest - "I get hard thinking of you, I was about to come last night from that kiss Cas.. Am I getting all this right? Are we on the same page?"
"Dean" Cas was now facing Dean and holding his hand - "I learned from humans to hide my feelings but I'm doing a crappy job and you felt that. Your eyes while looking at me are burning holes in my soul, the thought or the sight of you being hurt is making me crazy. I need you and I am scared, I am immortal yes but I do lost a lot of my grace helping Sam you know that." Cas's voice become even more hoarse: "The kiss last night nearly killed me with consumption – but I'll be ok, you on the other hand, you're not immortal – I don't want to lose you" said Cas sealing Dean's palm with a hot kiss.
"I don't want to waste anymore time hiding my feelings for you Dean...I love you!"

Chapter 3

"No. no. no .no. no - Goddammit - you cannot drop that bomb and evanesce" Dean cried looking at the dent in the pillow where Castiel rested his head when he was lying on the bed.
He force himself back to sleep only to wake up an hour later from the most vivid dream possible, that let him drained and sweated and his heart beating faster than ever like wanting to jump of his chest ...

"They were together sailing on a calm stretch of water, on a small boat while the sun was going down. Dean was handling the navigation system and was looking like he knew exactly what he's doing. Cas was watching him with lust in his eyes, never ceased to be amazed by Dean's beauty, by his muscular body that exudes sensuousness. He put down the glass that he was holding, and in three steps was behind Dean and without startled him began to trace imaginary lines against his arms, hardly touching the skin but enough to give Dean goosebumps. "You're so perfect Dean" murmured Cas on his neck and his hands were going underneath the t-shirt caressing Dean's vigorous chest while he began nibbling at the back of his neck, kissing softly under the hair line until Dean began to sound aroused. After setting the sailboat on autopilot and hooking the radar set on collision avoidance, Dean turned toward Cas and start caressing his dark hair and kissing his face, tracing his lisp with one finger, his green gaze penetrating deep in Castiel's eyes.. Cas shivered and Dean felt his lover's hardening cock against his leg, he arches his body to meet more of it..
Cas grabbed Dean's hair making him groan, bringing him close to his face "I need to hear it Dean" his voice was harsh "are your feelings for real or you're just enjoying playing with fire? D o y o u l o v e m e?"
"I love you dammit - I would do anything for you" responded Dean with a throaty voice.
"Good!" Cas grinned and commenced to kiss him passionately, his hands still holding tight Dean's hair, their tongues exploring, swirling, sucking, teeth mildly biting lips, getting them harder and harder, making them thrusting their hips, touching each other, pushing into each other through thin fabrics...Castiel's hand reaches under Dean's shorts, caressing his hip-bones, teasing around , scarcely touching with the tip of his fingers and finally stroking his cock, feeling drops of pre-cum lubricating his fingers, moving his fist around forward and reverse, his moves getting tighter, stronger, faster... He was looking at Dean's face, seeing his eyes glistering from pleasure, hearing his moans, going insane with lust and love and finally making Dean jerk and release a hot gush of cum into his palm and breathless put his head against Cas's neck"....

"C'mon!" – Dean looks down below his waist - "This is fricking ridiculous – worse than a teenager" he said heading towards the bathroom to clean up...