Everlasting Love

Suicidal Thoughts

I got home and called Sarah to see if she was coming over. "No, I'm not coming over. Hang out with Jimmy. I'm done hanging out with you since you checked out my boyfriend." Since I started to cry, I hung up without saying anything. I live in my dorm with Jimmy. That's how I met him. He had basketball practice from 4-7 so I was alone. I walked over to my bed and sat down. I thought of the things people have been saying to me today. What are you doing in here skunk bag? Jimmy's girlfriend is here! Dawson is a crybaby. Go hang yourself drunkie. I wondered why they said those things to me. I decided to take a shower since I was muddy and smelled like wine. I walked to the bathroom, took off my clothing and started the water. I stepped in and stood there. I washed my hair and body. I got out and went to the mirror to do my hair. Jimmy likes to leave the razors out of the shower so we don't step on them. I looked at the razor and thought of cutting. I grabbed it and looked up how to remove a blade from a razor on YouTube. I watched the video and shut my phone off. I took it out just as they said and held the blade with my right hand. I sliced my arm all the way down to my inner elbow. I bled a lot but I washed it off and held a towel over my arm. I screamed and didn't notice Jimmy was back from practice when he rushed to the bathroom door. He grabbed my right hand and took the blade from my hand. "Give it back! I wanna die!" I yelled. Jimmy took all the razors and put them somewhere else. I was really weak from bleeding and I was really dizzy. I think I passed out but I don't remember. When I woke up, I was at the hospital with Jimmy. I was on a medical bed. Jimmy and I were the only ones in the room. "Jimmy, what happened?" I asked. "You tried to kill yourself, Dawson" he said gently. I stayed quiet after he told me. Then, I said "It didn't work at all." "That's a good thing" said Jimmy.