A Greasy Romance

Chapter 3

Kyle's Point of View

     I woke up to light streaming through the curtains, birds chirping outside, the smell of breakfast being cooked downstairs... And a pizza with arms and legs sitting at the end of my bed, reading my biology textbook.
     I shot up and screamed. Perry screamed as well, dropping the book and tumbling backward off the bed. I climbed out from under the blankets, panting hard from fear, and walked around to where Perry was lying on the floor, stunned.
     "Don't do that!" I yelled, before realizing that my parents could probably hear me. "Don't do that," I repeated in a whisper.
     "I'm sorry," Perry said, pushing himself up and brushing dust from his crust. "I woke up a few hours ago and I got bored."
     I glanced at the clock sitting on my desk. It was just now seven- how long had he been sitting at the foot of my bed, watching me?
"Whatever. I need to get ready for school."
I started moving around the room, throwing on a t-shirt and a pair of jeans, quickly combing through my hair, and getting my textbook from the floor and shoving it back into my backpack.
"School? Do I get to come?" Perry asked excitedly, climbing onto my desk.
I looked at him. "You're a pizza."
"So? Pizzas need education too. Don't you want me to grow up and be smart so I can give my pizza husband and pizza kids a good life?"
"Pizza husband? Now you're a gay pizza?"
Perry shrugged, as if being a talking, gay pizza with arms and legs was the most normal thing in the world to be.
I sighed. "I guess you can come, but you'll have to stay in my backpack and not talk at all. Do you understand that?"
I waited for him to nod and climb into his box, which had been sitting discarded on my desk, before putting him into my backpack and heading downstairs.
My mom stopped me at the foot of the stairs, handing me a plate with bacon and eggs on it. "Were you okay up there? I heard a scream and it sounded like you were talking to yourself," she said.
I forced a smile. "I'm fine. I saw a spider on my ceiling when I woke up and I have a presentation that I needed to practice for today." My mom nodded and turned around.
"Liar," Perry said, his voice muffled by my backpack. I reached around and punched my bag quickly before my mom turned back.
"What was that?"
I smiled again. "Nothing. Love you, Mom," I said before fleeing quickly out the door, grabbing a piece of bacon and dropping the plate on the kitchen counter on my way.
I pulled Perry's box out of my backpack once I was safely on the porch. "What were you thinking?" I said. "My mom almost heard you!"
"I'm sorry," was the muffled reply. I opened my mouth to say something else when I heard shuffling noises coming from nearby. I looked up and saw one of my neighbors watching me from her porch with a scared look on her face.
"Good morning, Mrs. Harper. How's Sam?" She just nodded and quickly went back into her house. I sighed. "No more talking, Perry." I shoved his box back into my bag and started walking down my driveway.
I got into my car and forcefully threw my backpack onto the passenger seat.
"Kyle?"
"Yeah?"
     "Is school fun?"
     "It's awful."
     "Oh."
     "I'm sure it's fine for pizzas."
     "And Kyle?"
     "What, Perry?"
"That hurt."
"Shut up."