Ubiquitous

Fit For Two

There's good news and bad news. Bad news: She wakes up in a bathtub in some random house with a banging hangover. Good news: She wakes up with a guy who is amazingly cute. After all, the bathtub is fit for two.

xxxxx

The gravity pull on me seems a bit higher this morning. Who am I joking? It always has been, every morning. It's a bit different this morning, though. It feels like I have the whole Earth on top of me. It feels that heavy to get out of bed this morning. Maybe it's because of the overall state I'm in. 

My mind has been awake for almost a minute now. My eyes are still closed, though. My brain can't seem to process anything yet and I really can't feel anything. My brain-to-hand coordination is a bit off and so I've been trying to move my hand for a whole minute now. Alas, my left hand moves to touch my head. But there's a hard shell protecting it. It's...a helmet. If that's not weird enough, this bed I'm on isn't exactly...a bed. It's cold and hard, like marble or something. I don't even think I'm on a bed. I feel like I'm sleeping in a cup, hugging something. Probably hugging a bolster. A very...big bolster.

My eyes finally open and it feels like ripping them as if it had been glued shut. The first thing I see is a guy. It's the first thing I see because I'm clutching on to him like a koala to a tree. No kidding, my left leg is hugging him like a bolster-- see? I look up to see his face and for the first time this morning, I question my state. Who is he? Where am I? What state am I in?

Let's start off with what I'm sleeping in. It's a bath tub. An actual bath tub; white and fit for two. I use the right hand to push me up but, as I said, the gravity pull is superbly strong. Besides, the guy has his hand around me and...I don't want to wake him up when I move.

Ah, fuck it.

I sit up slowly, careful not to let vertigo get to me. It did, anyway. I clutch on the guy's jeans as my head throbs to the beat of Beat It. Damn Fit, what did I drink last night? Heck, whose party is this?

"Ow ow ow." I hear someone repeat. It's the guy, wincing because I was clutching to his jeans too hard that I clutched his skin too.

"Sorry." I say, my voice trembling like I'm speaking to the President or something.

The guy sits up, too. Hot damn, who did I snatch this time? This man is cute with a capital C. He has dark hair, wears Buddy Holly glasses and a black tee with a grey blazer on. He has one of those nerdy faces that somehow comes of as cute. Wow, Mr. Buddy Holly here can get it.

We kind of stared at each other for a while. No, not in a very romantic way. We're in a freaking bathtub, for Pete's sake. I guess he was also analyzing me as I was analyzing him. It's not wrong to analyze people up front, right? I mean, this is an appropriate time do so. Our eyes drift down to look at how our legs are twisted with each other and it is...a pretty clean tub. My eyes drift back up to see him looking at me once again. He smiles at me and says nervously, "Sooooo...it's one of those parties, huh?"

"Where you would wake up in a bathtub with a stranger." I add on with a smile. "At least we're not on the roof."

My eyes wander off to scan the bathroom. My gaze stops at the mirror at the end of the tub. Wait, there's a mirror at the end of the tub? The owner of this house likes to look at himself in the tub, I assume. Or is it a her? Whatever, that's just weird. But most importantly, the mirror reflects me, giving me the shock of my life. I look horrid. Well I shouldn't be shocked, I always do look horrid. But this time, it is quite shocking. I look like I went through a hurricane last night and took a hit from Mike Tyson, where I then proceed to enjoy some drugs with a bunch of hippies.