Love

Ivys dream

Closing my eyes I hear voices 'you've killed him! Monster! Your animal!' The voices yell as I toss and turn. My dream brought me back to when I was a child. I was but fifteen running away from home and I never got farther than New York. I stayed on the streets but my mind speeds up to one night when I was sleeping in an ally way.

   My older sister (who'd left our small family the first chance she got and never looked back). Was seen for the first time, she helped me to my knees n said 'you trying to be me lil sis?' Jokingly and I shake my head. 'What do you want' I snap 'well I came back to Chicago and went back to the house when.'

  She stopped there and brushed her long dark hair back 'when I heard your gay is this true?' Shrugging I say 'what's it to you?! You've left our family first time you turned twenty why the hell would you come to care bout me now?!' 'Easy lil sis........I just want to ask you a few questions' so she did and I allowed it.

   If only I thoroughly interrogated her. First it was 'how do you feel when a woman comes around?' Then it got bad 'have you ever fallen or had feelings for an older woman?' As I nodded my sister Avon asks 'who?' And I say 'my English teacher........Ms. Write' I remember. The look my sister got on her face 'i had her............odd thing was before I left she could never stop talking about you and how amazing you are.'

    I look down and Avon lifts my head to make my eyes meet hers. 'She kissed you and you didn't say anything because you enjoyed it.......' 'You liked her to?' 'Ivy I've been wanting to sleep with that woman since I met her but I've kept that in check as well as other temptations. Not that it was easy but now I think it's time that I give in.'

She takes me by the hand and leans in slowly as her lips start to purse she says 'to the impulses I once fought' then she'd kissed me, backing away I say 'WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING AVON?!!' But she kept on but this time talked to me softly. 'Calm yourself......don't tell me you haven't been dying to try this. Your beautiful as it is haven't you ever want to kiss someone who's beauty equalises yours?' She glided her hand up to my shoulder slowly.

Using the other hand to lift up my shirt she places her other hand on my stomach and slowly moves it up and down 'this.....this is wrong.' I say softly 'y you know it.........why are you doing this' 'you've always been the prettiest out of us two sisters. I've always admired you but that's also why I had to leave, after finishing collage even during collage all I could think about.......was you.'

She looks at me saying 'I'd wonder if I could ever see you again. But knew what would happen if I'd find you so I kept on with my business, never did I think you'd come close to my house.' 'S s so you thought it perfect that I c come here' I stutter because I develop a strange feeling. Avon takes my t shirt off then after doing so leans in and kisses my neck.

    Moving her head up to my ear she says 'I've always loved you' in a whisper and wriggles me out of my jeans. Shaking my head to defy her the scary thing was half of me didn't want to say anything. 'A a Avon stop........stop this now' my voice had gotten so soft that it became a hushed whisper.

  'Give in.......what your feeling right now i know at least half of you wants to do the same to me.' Fighting it over and over my rebellious will slowly starts to fade away and I get lost in myself. Taking Avon I get on top of her and she smiles 'there's what I was looking for' she says and I lean in and kiss her nooooo stop this now! I think to myself.

  But Avon wins off of my loss of control. Her clothes were off in merely seconds and after that I don't remember what happened. The next morning I woke up in new clothes on me with a note attached to to my shoulder.

   'Ever want to have an exhilarating night like that again come find me' shaking my head I was to angry for words, a man walked by and tried to rob me as well as three other men and a boy. Already infuriated by Avon I saw the men pull out switch blades and run after me, as much as I tried to hold back I murderously killed them all. After doing so, my arms, one side of my face and hands were covered in blood.

     Dropping to the ground I sit on my knees my arms flat beside me and as I look at the mans dead body in front of me a man behind me yells. 'MURDERER....MONSTER!!!!!! HES IN THE ALLY' i knew it was time for me to go but that's happened to who ever tried to kill me, harm me and or steal from me along the way of getting home.

     Once I'd gotten home and my parents opened the door I saw a light and could hear reality once again. Screaming and yelling "GAHHH AGHHHH AHHH!" Evelyn dumps water on me and I wake up immidietly. As my bluey vision becomes better I can see Evelyn standing beside me with a worried face and look down.

   Sighing I say "I must have a lot of explaining to do." Evelyn nodded so she sat beside me on the bed and I exsplained my whole dream to her but telling her it was a memory Evelyn says "it's not your fault......it was self defence from. From all the horrible people in the world." I nodded "once I got home and saw the news each of their descriptions were worse than the last."

   Sighing I say "they might have been horrible people but they didn't deserve to die" Evelyn patted me on the back "you won't hurt me......obviously since then you've got your anger in check right?' I nodded but I left out one part so I say 'my sister convinced me or have sex with her against my own will.......that's my fault though."

   Evelyn looks at me "the hell it is, that's your sister written all over, although you may have gotten angry she's the trigger. It wasn't fair to you because she took your strength away" "I don't know how it happened, when she was doing what she was doing I got this feeling and all the sudden my voice got softer. It was like."

   "You couldn't fight back?!" I nodded and Evelyn sighs. "You sister knew of something called 'oxytocin' it's a feeling the brain receives when your being touched by another person ESPECIALLY another girl." Evelyn looks down "it causes that feeling you got but as for the black out I think that's your cloud of anger and trying to fight back when you've already given into the feeling."

   Shaking my head Evelyn says "your here and that's the past......you won't hurt me or anyone else unless you have to." Evelyn gets under the covers and falls asleep with me as I slide back down and rest my head on a pillow she wraps her arms around my waist.