Freak week

Chapter Two: Shih tzu with a side order of fries.

Dear Robot Diary,
HOLY SHIH TZU!
Was that too aggressive of an intro? Let me start over.
So I've been down here in the school basement for an entire day, and I'm willing to risk my sanity and go outside than I am to stay ANOTHER MINUTE IN THIS GODFORSAKEN PLACE! Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I'm going crazy.
It all started when Banana and Marmie got hungry. Marmie was complaining about how Banana's name was banana and that all she can think about was how that questionably shaped fruit could satisfy her hunger. Then Banana turned to Harry by bringing up the fact that he used said banana to talk about how well they go with HIS NUTS, and then proceeded to stuff poor Banana's banana in his face-hole rather aggressively. Harry didn't like Banana's tone towards HIS NUTS so decided that now the only thing he's going to talk about are HIS NUTS. But Crush, my sweet, smart, Adonis like Crush, was able to get everyone back under control. "Hey! Why don't we all try to simmer down! This week down here is going to be very egregious if all we do is fight. Now why don't we craft something of our time here. It's salient that we all get along."
"I can think of something that simmers." Apparently Marmie zoned out after 'simmer down', "you grill it, and then put it in between a warm bun, drizzle some ketchup and mustard on hit, maybe even some relish-"
And then Banana interrupted her, "Oh yes! I would love a warm hound!"
Then Marmie cut in, "No, you mean a flaming puppy."
Harry piped up, "Are you guys talking about fire canines?"
Marmie, "Obviously it's called a scorching pooch."
Then, Robot Diary, I lost my shih tzu. "FOR GOD SAKE ITS CALLED A HOT DOG!" 
Que. "Ohhhhhh,"
"THE WHOLE POINT OF BEING DOWN HERE IS TO PROTECT OURSELVES FROM FREAK WEEK AND TO TRY TO STAY NORMAL! BUT YOU DUMB DUMBS ARE STRUGGLING WITH THE NAME FOR HOT DOG!"
Is what I wanted to say.
What I did say was, "Idiots."
And now RD, I am walking alone around the basement. I need to distance myself from all possible negative vibes, you know. I don't want to lose my shih tzu again.
The school basement is pretty big. There's surprisingly a lot of rooms and corridors that seem to be untouched and it smells like mothballs. V spooky.
As I'm walking around, I notice a small window close to the top of the ceiling at the end of a hallway. I begin sprinting to it, but in my excitement, I trip on my own two feet and fall on my face. Robot diary, you don't know how happy I was that no one was around to see that. "Lace are you okay?" I look up, and there's Crush standing behind me. (Insert swear word of choice here).
"Oh hey, Crush. Yeah, um...I'm great!" I tell him. Honestly, this would only ever happen to me.
"Really? Than why are you on the ground?" He asks me.
I scoff. "The ground needed a hug, Crush. He's suffering through Freak Week too, ya know."
Crush looked at me quizzically. "He?" I need to stop personifying objects around hot people.
"Yes, he." There's a kid named Ground in my English class, Ground Mulch. He had dirty brown hair, brown eyes, and freckles. Cleanest kid I know.
Crush helped me up. "What were you running from anyway?" I pointed to the window at the end of the hallway. "Oh. Why?" This boy has many questions.
"Because I want to see what outside looks like." I tell him. "It was raining shih tzu's yesterday." With that, I walk over to the window and stand up on my tip-toes. Despite being above average height, I couldn't quite reach, which is frustrating for someone who considers them self tall. Crush walks up beside me and has no trouble looking out the window. Another reasons why I have a crush on Crush, he's tall. Taller than me, and that's all that matters. Well, he's also smart, and good looking, but height is way up there at number one.
"Shorty." He says looking down at me. His eyes are a chocolatey brown eyes (I really miss chocolate)  and his shaggy brown hair was kind of in his eyes, in a cute...messy way.
"Im not short, you're just freakishly tall." Yes, Lace. So original. No ones ever thought to say that before. Crush just chuckles. "Sure." Yeah, I'm funny. Maybe he likes that about me. "Hey, can you actually see anything?" I peer of the edge, and at first I can't really see anything, just grass, and a couple bushes. But then it started raining brown clumps falling out of the sky. "Is that..." I start.
"I think so." Crush says.
"YO," Marmie and Banana walked into the hallway, "IS THAT SHIH TZU SHI-"
"GUYS IT'S RAINING DOGGY DOO!" Banana cut her off.
"Well, to shart off," Marmie begins, "What kind of clean up is going to ensue after Freak Week? Cause y'all know, I ain't cleaning up shih tzu."
"That's weird," Crush said. "Day two hasn't really began yet."
"Should we be worried?" I asked.
Crush shook his head. "I don't think so."

Later today, all of us were sitting around eating baked beans and saltines. Apparently, our principal has a giant fear of a possible zombie apocalypse and made a bunker in the basement with a whole lot of supplies. It's got everything from canned food, crackers, one of those camping stove kits, several cots, there's a bathroom, the entire Game Of Thrones series, and the 1989 Taylor Swift album. Our principle, Mr. George, really thought of everything. And now, we're trying to come up with a game plan.
"Well kids, hunkering down here is our best bet at surviving this week. If you want to leave, that's fine." Mr. Kevin told us. "But I'm afraid if you go outside you might be totally STOL."
"STOL?" Harry asked.
"It's an acronym."
"Acronym for what?"
"-MY NUTS!" Marmie yells.
Mr. Kevin rolls his eyes, "Shih Tzu out of luck." he explained. "Boy, did your parents drop you on your head as a child, or did Voldemort damage your brain cells when he attempted to use the killing curse on you?"
Harry started to blush. "Actually, I was named after Harry Styles."
"Well that makes sense, because your brain only ever goes one direction." Banana pointed out.
"Heyo!" Marmie gave Banana a fist bump.
Suddenly, Crush ran into the bunker, "French fries." Then he ran back into the hallway
Cheetahs can run up to speeds of 120km/h....or at least they used to. The few cheetahs that are left just kind of jog around in their enclosures now.
Anywho, what I'm saying Robot Diary, is that we probably reached 120km/h running after Crush.
We reached the one window in the basement, and let me tell ya, we weren't expecting this. There were french fries everywhere. It looked like the grass turned into fries, the trees turned into fries, bushes turned into tater tots.
"Did we die and go to heaven?" Banana asked.
"I hope so." I said.
Mr. Kevin was mumbling something. "...need...fries...potato...fries...tater...fries...tots...potato..."
"Mr. Kevin's, are you alright?" Marmie asked. "You sound like my grandpa from Idaho when he talks in his sleep."
Then something inside Mr. Kevin snapped. "POTATO!" He yelled and grabbed a stray piece of wood off the ground and threw it at the window. Glass went everywhere, and Mr. Kevin, with the grace of a gazelle, somehow jumped out of the window without being scrapped up by the shards of glass.
French fries, and tater tots started falling into our hallway in heaps, some fries where the size of my forearm.
"Where do you think he's going?" Harry asked, munching on a head sized tater tot.
Mr. Kevin was running off into the distance, stuffing himself with the greasy ambrosia that is the french fry.
"I don't know," I said. "But I bet he's not going to the nearest McDonalds."

After the Mr. Kevin fiasco, the rest of us boarded up the window with spare plywood lying around, and then proceeded to stuff our faces with french fries and tater tots.
"This week isn't just going to be survival of the fittest, but survival of the people with the most will power." Banana said reaching for another fry.
"Remember the track star who moved in junior year? His name was Will Power." Marmie piped up. "He had the record for most chicken nuggets eaten in ten minutes. The kid had the metabolism of a hummingbird."

Robot Diary, it's going to be, a very long, and salty Freak Week.
Yours truly,
-Lace