The Last Journey
I’m running through the woods. I do not care, if I get lost. Or where can I get. Or where am I. I’m enjoying it. Contact with nature, the silence, and at the same time beautiful lay of the forest. I would like this moment to stay forever. I’m in the rainforest. The sunlight cast a shadow of leaves on a soft forest floor. Rarely appearing magnolias and palm trees mean that I slowly manage from the forest. I'm in Indonesia, that's for sure. I feel so safe, I'm sure that there is no one and nothing dangerous. There are less and less trees, and suddenly disappeared completly. I look around. I’m probably on Solo, one of the major rivers of Java. I’m finally in a place where I can be happy. Alone surrounded by nature. The sound of the river calms me. It makes me feel sleepy. But I hear something that is bothering me for a long time. Sunlight hurts my eyes more and more. I see bright light . Shrill, monotonous sound is echoing in my head harder and harder. And then I wake up back in the hospital room.
There is no trees. There is no sun. There is no river. Just four bare walls and cold, flashing fluorescent light. There never was any Indonesia, any forest or any other place that I dreamed about before. And it never will be true. I’m bound to a small, gray room, flickering lamp, bed table and small window. I‘m looking around. I reach for the glass. I’m allowed to only drink water. Next to my glass are lying books by Jules Verne. I read these dozens of Times and I can not part with them. I take one. This is my favourite – „Five Weeks in a Baloon”. I touch the cover of an old issue, then I put it back. Since I read this book as a little girl, I dream of flying a hot air balloon. I dreamed about it hundeds of times, but I know that I will never fulfill this dream. Not like this. Doctors do their best, but nothing has changed in the last eight years.
Someone pushes on the handle. It was my mother. Energetic woman. Always smiling. Members of my family says that I look like her, but I have my eyes after my father. Anyway, I don’t know. I do not remember him. I’m watching her. She is smiling, as always, but her eyes are sad. She probably talked with my doctors and found out about my condition. I know it is to me worse than before. I am weak. I lay connected to a drip for last three weeks. I accepted the fact that if my condition will worsen even more, I will not get up.
- Hi, daughter- I heard from her. – Sorry I’m late, but you know… I have a lot of work.
She feels uncomfortable. I can see it. I know she wants to spend with me so much time as she can.
- Don’t worry, Mom. Everything is fine. – I want to reassure her.
Mom nods and turns quickly to the window, so I won’t see her tears.
A nurse enters a room.
- Excuse me, visiting hours ended.
Mom takes a coat from a hanger. Secretly scraped cheek.
- I love you, Mom - I'm talking quietly.
She smiles at me warmly and leaves without a word.
When the nurse changed my drip, I turned my face to the window. I want to see the last rays of the sun. It’s getting dark. The room feels gloomy. I feel that the drugs started working. I hear sounds from the street like through a wall, shadows are getting longer, it all becomes unreal. The whole cosmos is spinning inside my head. I am slowly drifting…
I dive in the crystal water. Beneath the surface is bright and friendly. I breathe so freely. I'm getting deeper and deeper, but I can see clearly what is happening. Opposite to me looms a large shape. I do not feel horror and tension, I'm more relaxed and calm. I slowly lift from the bottom. Shoals of small fish flow by. I don’t feel distracted by them. I'm going ahead as on the face of the earth. Shoals are flowing above me. There is a huge octopus in front of me, waving it’s tentacles. It looks into my eyes in such a human way. It’s body is red and it’s eyes are black with gold pupils. Getting gloser and closer to me. It moves smoothly and quietly. For a moment, time stands still. Hypnotizes me up and down. Now it’s just me and it. Strong grip of its tentacle blows my peace. Another tentacles entangle my body. I'm scared, but not pluck up. I look at its sad eyes. One of her limbs weaves around my neck. I feel like I was suffocating. Instinctively I try to break free. Darkness covered my eyes.
I hold my throat and breathe heavily. It was just a dream. Calm down. It’s three o’ clock in the night.
The rectangle of light comes through the glass in the door of the room and illuminates the book lying on the table, as if it was the answer. Suddenly I feel very tired. I feel like I float.
I'm in a balloon gondola, I know this place very well. I dreamed about this for a few weeks now. Always the same dream. I get up, I go to the edge, then lean on the railing. Outside I see the same as always, but I am delighted anyway. Below me stretches savannah dotted with few trees. On the horizon I see the jungle. Balloon moves slowly and steadily. Nor did rises nor falls. I watch closely but do not see any creatures. I never see anything. Every time is the same. Does it reflect my life? Every dame the same? Live in a baloon is not what I wish it would be. You can guide it, but the wind can be ruthless. It can take the opportunity to control your own life. Lonely and trapped in a balloon aimed nowhere. Maybe it’s time to change something? I can’t take more of this routine! Or maybe lean more? Maybe I could see more. Finally see the animals in the savannah. It has always been one of my dreams. Wind starts to blow harder. Air baloon sways dangerously. I feel like I’m losing ground. I am falling. Finally, I feel really free. Nothing can stop me or limit me. I see more and more animals down here. I approach them. They are so beautiful and free. So real. I’m so close. I can almost touch them. I am about to land and now I know I will never wake up from this dream. But I’m not afraid.
I’m finally happy.
Hello guys! I hope you will enjoy this little story I wrote in June this year. It happened to win the national story competition. I just was in a mood to translate this and share with you guys. This story is a little darker (duuh) than #KeNetty fanfic. Tweet me your opinion about it!
If you see a typo, don't understand something or just want to contact me, do it! :D
My twitter @ArosLemon
mail me: someguitarmusic@gmail.com
Goodbye everyone.
-Arek
