A Lost Bird(Teen Titans Fanfic/RobRae)

A Mother's Love

From her chair, the laughing of her friends were clear and happy, enjoying life.

Raven turned her attention away from her friends to look out the window, unsure of what she was feeling. She excused herself to her room. Her friends didn't notice or take mind.

In her room, lying there, she slowly counted the ticks of her clock.

1... 2............ 17,998... 17,999...

Sighing at her inability to sleep. She sat up, popping her joints. She held a hand to her head. The fever that started two days ago worsened and the headache that came yesterday wouldn't go away, no matter how many pills she took. She took another one anyway.

'Destroying' her father took a huge toll. It was almost the beginning of a new day, one she thought she'd never see. It was a miracle she was still alive. A miracle she didn't believe in.

A curse. That sounded more fitting.

On the roof, standing there at the edge, impatiently waiting for the sun to brighten the city, Raven looked at her arms, half expecting for the red marks to line her arms like blood. She may have postposted this world's ending, but her home- Azarath and her mother, cannot be brought back.

Sorrow. Grief. Anguish. All the same really.

Her father wasn't gone. She only gave the world time... and time goes quickly. Time was her enemy.

It was rather pointless. To try and save the world, no matter how many times her friends have, no matter how many time she has or will. You can't stop time from continuing, much like her father. He will be back, she was sure of it.

So why does she keep fighting? Her father once asked, in her dreams. She didn't reply, she didn't know then, not even now.

Hope she would think, but she doesn't know what she is hoping for. Of course she wants people to live, but that doesn't seem to be the reason she's here.

Jolting in surprise, bringing a hand to her cheek where the water drop fell, she raised her head, now seeing the rain clouds that had formed overhead, hiding any sunlight that would've warmed her if not for the bad weather. Disappointed, she walked back to the roofs door, deeply breathing the rains fresh scent. Back to her room, she unclipped her cloak, simply staring at it. She didn't know how long she stayed that way, tightening her grip with each second, until she flung it to the floor, wanting nothing more to do with it. With what it represented. How long does she have to fight?!

Huffing, she suddenly cast about the room, grabbing spellbooks. Black energy turned objects to dust and made gashes in the walls. So strong were her emotions that the book she held and all the precious others ripped apart. Angry and sad, she fell to the floor on her knees. She didn't want to do THIS anymore, she couldn't pretend to be happy, she didn't deserve to be, not with who and what she was. Gazing at the floor, it took her some time to focus on the words she never read before.

It was a letter. From her mother. Ripping apart her books allowed a scret page to fall out. She read intently.

My Dearest Raven,

I'm sorry I couldn't have been with you longer. It was all I wanted, but that cannot be. You will have learned by now that Azarath is destroyed. As of this moment, Azar and the council are working tirelessly to find a way to stop Trigon. He truly is sadistic, he has told of his coming, of a traitor who will help, loving to watch us tear ourselves apart with mistrust. I wish I could end this somehow, I'd live my life now and after in torment if I could save Azarath. I offered myself to Trigon, but he refused, laughing at my cries. He spoke of Earths destruction, getting there by using the gem, you. Before he can do that, I invented a spell gathered from ancient texts. It's possible my sweetest Raven, what we've talked about for many years- you can take away your powers and memory. It was hard just finding those spells, but I created a new spell, not without great sacrifice, where you can do both at the same time. You can live a normal life without Trigon haunting you. It will save you and Earth. I am able to send this letter to you by a transportation spell, connected to this book. There's the risk of you not finding it, but I desperately hope you will. Azarath will be destroyed and my demise draws closer, but know, I will have been thinking of you, even in my last thought. You are not someone who is only capable of destruction, Raven. You are my beloved daughter, we were happy and have endured so much together. Memories I hold close to my heart. I only want you to be happy. Please, Raven, stay safe and never lose hope. And Raven, I have and will love you always.
- Arella

Tears fell from Ravens eyes as she read the letter, adding to the ones of the writer. Arella must have written it just before she died. She sobbed and cried, letting it all out, until she couldn't cry anymore. Numb, she turned the paper over, reading the encryption. Something rose in her. It felt like... hope? No, that wasn't it.

Words came out without her meaning to "I... don't have to do this anymore..."

Relief. That was it.