no homo ➶ lilo

five: i need you and i hate it

Louis sighs as he watches Liam talk to another girl as if this was a cheesy high school romance movie. He had both of his arms resting on either side of the girl as he leaned close to her, whispering something.

The smaller boy looked away when he gripped her waist and leaned in to kiss her. He missed the longing look Liam sent him.

He kept his head down as he walked, not watching where he was going. He turned the corner and instantly collided with someone. He squeaked and fell to the floor with a thud.

He looked up to find a boy with blue eyes staring back at him. The boy apologized, explaining how he didn't know where he was going.

"So sorry about that, babe." He says, giving Louis a helping hand. The smaller boy took it gratefully and blushed.

"It's okay. I wasn't looking where I was going." He whispers, dusting himself off. The boy shakes his head, his black hair ruffling slightly.

"It was my fault. I'm Logan, by the way." He says holding out his hand again. Louis takes it and shakes it. Okay, he had to admit, he was cute.

"Louis." He replies, looking down.

"I like that name. I'm surprised I haven't seen you around school. Someone as pretty as you would've stuck with me."

Louis goes to give a witty remark about him being a fuckboy when a hand slips around his waist tightly.

"Kindly fuck off." Liam says. Logan scoffs and shakes his head.

"And you are?"

"Someone you don't want to mess with." Liam retorts, fists clenched in anger. Louis pretended not to notice.

Logan seemed a bit afraid and he shrugged his shoulders, turning around.

"Your loss." He says before walking away. Louis stands in the middle of this with fury radiating off of him.

"What the fuck was that?" He snaps once Logan was out of sight. Liam flinches at his harsh tone but quickly recovers.

"He was obviously a fuckboy. I was doing you a favor—"

"I can take care of myself, thank you very much. You don't get to ignore me for days and then come in like nothing happened." Louis retorts.

"If I remember correctly, you told me to leave you alone. At least until I figure myself out." Liam explains.

"And?"

"And what?"

"Did you figure yourself out?" Louis questions, pushing away from the taller lad.

"Yeah–well, sort of. I never thought about liking guys but I like you?" The statement comes out more like a question.

"You still don't know?" Louis asks.

"I was wondering if you could help me with that."

"Help you, how?"

"We could um, I don't know, maybe–uh–shit. Kiss?" He says, laughing a little at the end.

Louis stares at him for a moment, eyes wide.

What?

"I don't think I can—"

"Please, Lou. I just–I need to know. I feel so weird around you. It's driving me insane and I don't know what to do."

"Can we–can we talk about this after school?" Louis asks and Liam nods frantically. The small boy gives him a hesitant smile before leaving to class.

****

"My–my parents aren't home, so—"

"I never agreed to anything, Payno." Louis snaps, fiddling with his fingers as he sat in the passenger seat.

Liam shifted in his seat awkwardly, and continued to drive, silence trapping them. When they reach Liam's house, Louis steps out and waits for Liam by the front door.

The taller lad unlocks the door slowly, stepping in and throwing his backpack on the couch. Louis follows suit and stands awkwardly by the doorway.

"If...we're gonna do this, it's going to hurt me." Louis whispers, embarrassingly.

"Why?"

"Because I like you and you using me as an experiment sort of makes me feel crushed." The smaller boy admits, blushing.

"Tell me if you don't want to do this, then we won't. I'll–I'll figure this out on my own."

Louis shakes his head and walks over to Liam slowly. He looks up at him, studying his face for a moment before looking at his lips.

Without thinking too much into it, he leans in slowly, lips barely ghosting over Liam's. They stand there for a few seconds, neither of them moving towards the other.

Liam brings his hands up to grip Louis' hips roughly, pulling him until he's flushed against his chest. Louis lets out a shaky breath and closes his eyes.

Liam stares at the smaller boy, breath completely taken away from how beautiful he is, from his fluttering eyelids to thin lips. How could he have not noticed these things before? How could he have been this blind?

He can't wait any longer as he leans in and kisses Louis roughly. The small boy lets out a surprised noise, hands tightening around Liam's shirt.

He quickly recovers and kisses back, lips moving frantically, until their unashamedly snogging in the middle of Liam's home.

The taller lad pushes Louis against the wall, tongue darting out and licking into his mouth, tiny gasps of air coming out of the smaller boys lips.

Louis leans his head back against the wall, letting Liam trail his lips down his neck, leaving a mark that'll surely get Louis questions from his family.

His nails dig into Liam's shoulders, the feeling being all too much for him. Liam grunts and moves his lips back to Louis' and sighs in content.

They kiss lazily for a few more seconds before Liam pulls away, pecking his lips one last time before stepping away completely.

Louis stays against the wall, breathing heavily and staring at Liam with hooded eyes. His lips were red and swollen and Louis wanted to kiss him again.

He shook his head and looked away.

"That was–wow." Liam says, running a hand through his hair. Louis bites his lip subconsciously.

"Thank you. This uh, helped."

Louis frowns when he hears the words. He thought that maybe the kiss meant something more to him. But.

He was just an experiment. 

And he would be nothing else.