Finding Him - Saving Her

Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. The magnificent Marie Lu created the wondrous books. I am only showing you all what my imagination would be for how it continues from her ending.

I should have thought of this. I knew Day. Tess and I knew him the best, but it was my decision to not tell him about the war. I should have known. Day and I were from opposite worlds, but we had the same mindset about most things. He e told me once of how much agony he felt when he looked at me, almost as much as the love he felt. It was a constant battle for him to be with me.

I don't want that. I want to feel the love he once held for me. I want to finally get to say those words back to him. It tortures me inside to have him here and not hold him, not kiss him, not love him, but I didn't want him to look at me and see his mother's death. I didn't want to be a trigger. It hurts still knowing he used to feel that way about me. We loved each other so passionately that it over rid my guiltiness, but that never meant he forgot. Now that he finally did, how am I supposed to help him get that tortured look on his face again every single time he saw me? I want his eyes to light up the way they did when he asked about Eden in the hospital. I want his heart to flutter in relief when he sees me walk safely in the room like he does with Tess. I want him to look at me the way he looked at me the first time we kissed, without any blame or heartache.

The doorbell rang. That was quick of him. Tess convinced me to at least hear him out. I agreed and said he could come over now, considering I'd get to my apartment before he did. It took him only six minutes and thirty eight seconds to walk here.

I open the door, half expecting to see the teenage boy with bright eyes that could cut through metal if he was angry enough. I see another form of him, but it is not one I was expecting to meet. Day is angry. He's angry with me, to be exact. He waits for me to invite him in, as he always did, but there is no smile. "Come in, Day," I blurt out, hoping to get the look off his face. He nods in greeting and walks to my living room, taking in the sight before his eyes. It looks like he's trying to place something. His eyes land on my bedroom door. It is unique, I'll admit. Since I wear a uniform, I can't wear the paperclip ring Eden made for me, so I hung it on my door. He sent it from Antarctica, claiming to have made it himself, but I had my doubts.

Day's first ring looked too similar to this ring. The way the metal twists around each other and flows is too familiar. Clearly, Day thinks so too.

"Where did you get that?" he asks. This catches him off guard, and the anger seems to have dissipated. I walk to his side, reluctant.

"I'm not too sure. Eden said he made it, but.."

He is in a daze. His eyes don't leave the paperclip for fifty seconds. I study him. His hands are clenched tightly together, and a crease has formed on his forehead again. "Day?"

He shakes his head and looks to me. "I made that." I nodded slowly. "Somebody made me one." He holds up his hand. My breath catches in my throat at the memory. He made me one that saved my life. I had hoped this would save his, too. "So I made one and told Eden to send it to whomever made this one."

"He did." I note. Day is still working through a memory block. I can see his brain working in frustration. Half of me hopes he never gets through the fog while the other half is dying for the old Day back.

"But this wasn't the first one I made?" his question is unsure. I take a breath. How much is safe to tell him? How much am I willing?

"We should talk, Day," I gesture to the couch. He hesitates a moment, looking back once at the ring before sitting on the couch. I feel a pull to sit next to him just to be closer. My childhood hormones seem to have not left me. I sit on the chair beside him instead. "I'm not taking your money." A smile forms on his lips. My mind is in wonder. He used to never smile so freely. I am surprised to find that I like that.