New Lives (A Nathan Gardner Story)

Chapter 3 - Show Me

Nathan and David spoke a little longer before it was time for David's therapy session, then Nathan started back home. His head was reeling and he had to keep an eye on the speedometer to keep himself in check. He needed to see Sydney – talk to her, feel her. David opened Nathan's eyes to a few things and bringing them up over the phone on his way home just wouldn't do.

He pulled into the garage and all but ran inside. He found Sydney in the kitchen washing a few pans from breakfast. She didn't hear his footsteps over the water. "Sydney Turner," he said, his voice soft.

She looked over her shoulder at him and smiled. "Nathan Gardner," she answered, playing along.

Nathan placed his hands on her face and kissed her with a gentle passion. "Why me?" he asked as he pulled away.

"Why you what? Oh, no...was it horrible? Nathan, I'm sorry I..."

Nathan shook his head. "You forced him to choose. You threatened to leave him...you didn't give him any alternatives."

Sydney was confused. "So...he made me out to be a bitch?"

"Huh?" He quickly understood how he sounded. "Oh, Syd, no, no..." He turned off the water, took the towel from Sydney's shoulder, and dried her hands, his eyes never leaving hers. "Why did you treat me so differently? You...you showed me so much support before you ever even..." He swallowed. "...loved me. How did I earn that from you? Why didn't you ever enforce any sort of, uh..."

Sydney's eyes were warm. "Ultimatum?" Nathan nodded, silently. "Figures he'd ask you about that." She ran her finger along the back of his hand. "David had to be forced into a decision or nothing ever would have happened. We were engaged and he didn't even think...he never..." She closed her eyes for a moment, then continued. "He didn't want my help, so I threw it at him. He either took it or I left."

"And me?"

Sydney smiled. "You called me, remember? You wanted help and you came to me for it." She blushed. "I never wanted to put myself in the same position that I did with David - and I didn't, you didn't let me. Nathan, you'd been without real support for so long and..." Her eyes began to water. "...you called me. I would have done anything for you from that point on."

"And you did." He kissed her again. "You let me choose my path. I thought the choice was taken from me. Susan tried so hard, but...I needed more."

Sydney tried to keep herself together. "Nathan we've had this conversation before."

"A version of it, sure, before my conversation with David today. Before knowing..." He kissed her yet again.

"Before knowing what?"

He didn't hesitate. "Honey, I keep telling myself, keep telling you that you saved me, but what you truly did was show me that I had the ability to save myself." Sydney's smile returned. "I don't know how I never put it together before..."

"I told you I didn't want all the credit." She winked at him and he scooped her into his arms. "Nathan..."

"Where's Susan?"

"Playing tennis at Charlie's..."

"Until?"

"'Round six." He was carrying her up to their bedroom and she giggled.

"Nothing but time." He closed the door with his foot, then placed her in the center of the bed. "You've never tried to force anything on me."

"And I won't. How fair would that be to either of us?"

"I love you," he breathed against her neck. "I thought I didn't earn what we have, but I did, didn't I?"

Sydney pulled his shirt up over his head and kissed his chest. "Nathan, you're such a good man...bad things happen to good people, it's the way of the world. I wanted to love you long before I told you I did, I know you know that."

He slid her shorts down her legs, his hands lingering on her thighs. "I want this life, Syd, more than anything. Our home...our bed..." His tongue tickled her ear. "We'll fight, it's inevitable, but I will never go back to my old vices, I swear. I don't want to go back on my promises to you and Susan...I don't want to be like him."

"You're not selfish enough to be like him." They were both fully undressed now, looking one another in the eye. "You told me everything about you that you thought could make me leave and here I am. That was something David could never bring himself to do. He always had his secrets and demons. I know all of yours, I accept them, and if the time ever comes when you have to fight them..."

"It won't." His lips claimed hers in a new way. He was giving himself to her and she could feel his surrender. "...but if it does, fight with me...fight for me..."

"Always...you know what you mean to me."

"Show me." His words were a cross between an order and a plea.

They kissed and caressed for a few moments before Sydney took those words and acted on them. "Sit up for me, love," she purred and Nathan complied. His back rested against the headboard and she straddled him, taking him easily into her body. Soft sounds passed Nathan's lips as she slowly rocked against him. He loved when she took control like this; it was sensual more than anything else. She made him truly feel her and the connection was as good a high as the release.

Nathan's fingers lightly trailed down her back, then her calves...up her thighs and along her stomach. He moved to the back of her neck, letting his fingers become lost in her hair. "Sydney..." His head tipped back as she moved her hips in slow circles, the feeling exquisite.

"Look at me," she whispered, placing her hand under his chin. Their eyes locked again and she changed her rhythm. She began to rise and fall slowly, almost letting him slip from her depths, then taking him back in. She was in control, but this was far from torture. She knew how much he loved this particular feeling...and he had asked her to "show him" what he meant to her. He meant feeling loved, complete, and physically good and she was certainly focusing on the physical aspect right now. Still looking at her, he reached between them and began to stroke her. She gasped and her pace sped up. "I'm supposed to be taking care of you," she said, trying not to moan through the words.

"You are." With his free hand, he gently moved her face down to his and another deep kiss was exchanged. He didn't break away from her until her felt her release, taking some of the breath from his own lungs. "Making you feel good makes me feel even better," he confessed. She smiled at him and tangled her fingers in his hair as she continued to pleasure the both of them. Only moments passed before Nathan felt familiar warmth spread through his body. "Not yet," he said, almost whining.

"Don't fight, lover, not today. Just feel me..." She cried out, a second orgasm sweeping through her, and Nathan pressed his head to her chest, holding her tightly as he joined her. He breathed hard against her skin and she rubbed his back, her cheek resting on the top of his head. "Doesn't it feel good to let go?" she asked innocently.

He laughed. "Right now everything feels good."