Alone [crazy!castiel]

Outside the window wintertime creeps; the spider-fingers of trees grow black, stark and web-like, between the lattices on the windows. Castiel wanders; lifts himself from the bed, sits with his knees drawn up, on a chair; flits from bedside to window, where he presses his palm slowly against the glass, always the same way; fingertips first, as if the cold will bite, and then, slowly rolling his hand against the window. How he missed the freedom of the outside world, how he missed being able to go out there, with nobody supervising.

He fiddles with the wristband; picks at it with his short fingernails. It reads, in short, block capitals, Castiel Winchester, and when he reads it the first time, he does so with hollow, mystified eyes.

Dean visits him every day. Most times he would comment on how much better he was doing, how he and Sam were doing. Meg always insists that Dean hasn't visited once since the day he was admitted, but Castiel refuses to believe that. Because he is always there.

It is strange just how much his behaviour changes. Often, he would be almost as if it were himself again, reeling off brilliant and yet random facts that Meg didn't even consider, let alone know. Yet, often when he is alone, he would be like a lost child, rocking back and forth on the floor of his room, hugging his knees into his chest as he tried to ignore the voices. His brethren, Lucifer, even sometimes the Winchesters. All reminding him just how far he'd fallen. However, when Dean visited, all those voices went away.

Dean had promised he'd visit today. He'd phoned him, infact. However, he sounded a lot different to what he usually did - his voice shallow and saddened-, and Castiel couldn't help but notice how he had called to tell him. He never calls, he just turns up out of the blue. Despite that, Castiel is overjoyed to have the hunter's company again. Even Meg seems pleased. So, he stands in wait by the window, silently willing his friend to hurry.

[ I am unsure on whether or not to develop this further, and make it into a short fic, but here, have this. I was having a lot of crazy!Castiel feels, so this happened.

thanks for reading, feel free to comment if you wish~ ]