Obsession, Wanting you (BoyxBoy) [ON HOLD]

chapter 1: Dreams

I shivered and twitched under the touch of his cold fingers on my skin. Was this how it was supposed to feel? Was this actual passion? I felt the rate of my heart quicken in my chest at the thought. I was so ready, so hot, so confused, it was so different from anything I had ever felt in my entire life. I could imagine the pleasure seeping from my pores. Beads of sweat began to pop up on my skin, like budding rose petals. I sucked in a massive amount of air and forced my eyes to stay open. I wouldn't want to miss any of the fun. Need and anticipation began building up inside of my chest, and I knew in that exact moment I would be willing to claw and scratch in order to get the feeling I so desperately craved. I wanted to moan, but it stayed stuck in my throat, it felt like a lump the size of a plum seed. Gentle hands began holding me down, digging into my chest; begging to get me out of my clothes.

I heard the slow, gentle, shredding of my shirt. Then his fingers began to trail over my body. I placed my fingers on his parted lips; I didn't hesitate to put my middle finger into his mouth. He instantly began to suck as if it were an automatic response. I laughed because for some reason it was really cute.

"Michael..." I whispered horsely.

He sighed and one of his hands ended up tangled roughly in my hair. 

"Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, please...I want you" I growled.

I awoke startled with my hand clutching my heart and my alarm clock buzzing in my ear rather unpleasantly. Sweat drenched every inch of my body causing my night clothes to cling to my arms and legs like a second skin. I couldn't get enough air into my lungs, it felt like I was being born again. I flopped around helplessly before I snatched my alarm clock from my dresser and slammed it into the ground until It stopped ringing. I was breathing heavily as I ran a shaky hand through my thick, messy, black hair. That dream still had me on edge. I slid from my bed slowly and stood to my feet. I had pushed the snooze button too much, so I knew I was going to be late to school, I didn't care. I was still submerged in pointless thoughts. I had that same dream every night; It didn't seem to be getting any better, not even with the sleeping pills. I sighed as I rubbed my chin in utter confusion. Not only was I embarrassed, I could hardly look at myself in the mirror.

My room was supposed to be my safe heaven, but even here I felt like someone had intruded in on me. I shuffled awkwardly to my closet and pulled out a pair of jeans and a freshly cleaned, pressed shirt. I didn't bother to make sure my articles of clothing matched, I just walked from my room, across the hall, and into the bathroom. 

Get a grip, Jack.

I stretched a bit and came face to face with myself in the mirror.

"Stop being this way..." I whispered to my reflection.

"And for god sake, get a better eye color" I snapped.

My eyes were a boring light brown and looked strange paired with my pale, lifeless skin.

"I am straight, I have a beautiful girlfriend" I said aloud, It felt right to say this to myself.

It felt reassuring. I smiled at my reflection, flashing two rows of white teeth.

"Her name is Vivian and I love her body" I said calmly to myself before I splashed water over my face.

I already felt a huge weight being lifted off of my shoulders. But still, the thought of Michael lingered in my mind; it was enough to make me sick. Michael was some smart kid who always came to class on time; he was an easy target for bullying. I felt my lips turn downward. I didn't know much about him, except that we had to work together in English. Of all the people to get paired with, I get the Know it all loser. I began to angrily get ready for school, practically shoving my clothes onto my body; I decided I would say something to him. In my dreams or not, he was still just some loser.

I ate breakfast with my mom quickly before I sped off to school in my Porsche. I had a new found excitement. I was going to lay into Michael so hard. I could feel my skin tingling. Vivian, my girl, called and texted a few times but I just pushed the ignore button on her. No doubt she would just be bothering me to walk in to school with her holding hands. She liked that kind of thing. She took joy in Prancing around in her cheer leading outfit and hanging off of me like I was some sort of prize. I shook the thought of her away and rolled into the parking lot of the school. It was only a minute before the bell was about to ring. Kids shuffled into the small double doors of our school like robots called to be destroyed. Their faces were always annoyed or tired or depressed, school did that.

I took one last deep breath, locked my car doors, shoved the keys in my pockets then joined the robots. My shoes squeaked awkwardly on the clean floors. First hour was English class with Ms. Douast. She had always been my best teacher. She smiled at me as I waved at her. She had short, choppy, yellow hair, and a pudgy face with deep set eyes. I knew back then she must have been pretty. I could tell. I rushed past her and sat at my desk. My jaw was tightly clinched along with my fists in anticipation. Other students began to pile into the class room chatting and laughing before Ms. Douast began class. I seemed to be the only one with any problem.

I watched the door like a hawk, and sure enough Michael came strolling in. My heart began to flutter in my chest and my knees felt so weak. He was going to get it. Butterflies floated around in my stomach and my jaw relaxed as he began to approach. His eyes were an intense green with flecks of gray; His features were round and innocent. He was obviously about 5'5" with long, shoulder length, curly brown hair. My mouth felt dry as he scooted into the seat next to me. I eyed his raggedy, old, torn converse shoes. My courage had seeped away from me.

"Hey, jack" He finally grumbled in his light, sweet voice.

I shut my eyes tightly as the dream of him came flooding back into my mind. 

"I am straight, I have a beautiful girlfriend"...