Breakaway

Chapter 13 - Breakaway

DANA

I never thought I'd be unhappy about having my brother around, but over the last ten days I'd come to absolutely hate it.

Brenden hadn't hit Eric like he'd threatened to, not even in practice or anything like that. He was just making it impossible for me and Eric to continue what we'd started.

Instead of sitting up like a normal human being when we were all hanging out in the living room, he would sprawl out on the sofa, taking up the whole thing all by himself, making sure Eric and I had to sit apart from each other on the recliners. He'd started escorting me to my room at night and waiting by my door until he heard me click the lock, apparently to keep Eric from touching me or something like that. He had even rode shotgun in the car if we all went somewhere together, making certain Eric and I couldn't even do so much as hold hands for that brief time.

It was driving me insane. He was driving me insane.

Worse than that, I couldn't understand it. Not really. Brenden had told me a few times how shocked he was that I'd kissed him when he'd gotten off the plane in Portland. He kept talking about how baffling it was that I was able to hang out with all the guys on the team without starting to panic. He'd even touched my arm a couple of times—whether on purpose to test me or on accident—and I hadn't panicked. He knew it, knew I was doing better. There was no other reason for my improvement if not for the work Eric and I were doing. Brenden had to see it, even if he didn't like it.

It had been so long since the two of us had been able to touch in nearly any way that I'd jumped this morning when Eric put his hand on my waist. I was in the kitchen getting a cup of coffee, and Brenden had just gone off to take his shower. That was pretty much the only time we got to be alone anymore, when Brenden showered.

Eric didn't pull away even though I'd jumped. "Okay?" he asked quietly.

I nodded, but I set my coffee cup down on the counter. I didn't want to risk burning either of us if I started shaking too much. I had no way of knowing if I would regress after not continuing with what we'd been doing. How far could we take things before the next panic attack would start?

He pulled me closer to him, turned me in his arms so I was facing him, and used his other hand to caress my cheek.

He was going to kiss me. I knew it. I could see it in his eyes, in the way he was lowering his head down to me. It had been so long, I'd felt so distant from him, that my whole system immediately went into overdrive.

How was it possible for something so simple to cause my body to freak out like that? My heart kicked into a gallop and I couldn't take a breath to save my life. I didn't want to, if it meant putting an end to this fluttery, vulnerable sensation.

I never let myself be vulnerable. Never.

Not for anyone but Eric. Even though it was nearly enough to paralyze me with fear, I couldn't stop myself from letting him in, past my wall of defenses and into the areas where he could hurt me.

I lifted my head some, watching his lips move closer to mine.

His hand dug in a bit at my waist, pulling me closer, almost lifting me off my feet. With his other hand, he knotted his fingers in my hair and tipped my head back. It felt like he was preparing to ravish me, to kiss me hard and deep enough to make my toes curl.

I almost wanted him to.

But instead, when his lips touched mine, it was just a breath of contact. Nothing more than a whisper and a shiver.

My whole body was alive, pulsing and aching for more. I leaned in, tried to deepen the kiss, but Babs cleared his throat from the hallway. "Incoming."