Wanting out.

The start

WARNING: THIS IS A 'M' RATED BOOK FOR MATURE READER ONLY.

My name is Amanda Whitely, I am 16 years old, Oh! And I can't speak.

I was born pre mature.

I live in a largish 2 story house in the North shore, New Zealand. my bedroom is the coldest and darkest room in the house and - unfortunately- the one furthest from my moms room. I know what you're thinking, 16 and wanting a bedroom closer to Mom's room?!?

Believe me, it's torture.

7 years ago ( in case you're not a nerd like me, that's when I was 9) my dad was shot by a stupid man who lost a game of poker and went aggro. My mother, who was cheating on him at the time with her art professor, didn't care that much. She buried him in the common cemetery, without a gravestone I might add, took his money and moved on. Now, I'm 16, mom married Victor (her art professor)two years after dad died and SHE is happy. I, on the other hand, want to kill myself. Why?

Victor, of course.

(WARNING: EXPLICIT CONTENT. WEAK MINDED READERS SKIP TO THE NEXT CHAPTER)

And I am not joking. it started when I was 11, one night he got into a fight with my mom because she was spending his money on buying alcohol every day.

I was hiding around the corner listening to their argument when I heard the door slam. Guessing it was Victor who left, I creeped out of my hiding place and tapped on the door opening it slightly. I was wrong , instead I came face to face with an angry Victor.

He pulled the door open so it slammed on its hinges.

"Aww is wittle Amanda scared?" he mocked me with a crazy smile on his face, his eyes shining like a wild animal on a hunt.

"Don't worry, she'll be back. But your already here..." he trailed off and stared walking towards me. I backed away and ran into the bathroom, scared.

"Amanda..." he teased "come out come out where ever you are..." he came walking up behind the door. I locked it.

I heard footsteps leave, so I unlocked the door and opened it.

Bad Move.

He pounced on me, pushing me back into the bathroom, only, he came inside too. he pinned me on the floor, with on hand keeping my hands above my head and my legs splayed beneath him.

"You want to run away eh? How fitting is it that you can't scream for mommy?" he sneered, then proceeded to lift my top up with the other hand.

I felt sick.

After he successfully got my top off, he then went to take off my pajama pants. he sniggered and looked up at me

"No under wear? you are so helpful" he laughed

I looked back at him in fear.

I knew exactly what he was going to do.

I could only look to the side in a vain attempt to ignore him undressing and crawling back to lean over me.

"Oops!, I forgot!" he said and quickly locked the door. I saw him open a little packet, I looked at him wondering what it was.

"Don't want you getting pregnant before mommy do we?" he mocked me. "Ill be back in a jiffy, don't move I just have to get something." and with that he got up and left.

I ran to the door to try escape and heard him locking it from the outside. my eyes widened in fear.

What was he getting?

He came back into the bathroom with something behind his back.

"We need to go to your room. you have bedposts" this confused me. Bedposts? what would they do?

In my room he locked my door and dragged me onto my bed and pulled out what he was hiding from me. Handcuffs. He snapped one side on my left wrist and looped it through my bedpost. oh bedposts. then locked the other on my right. he grabbed out two more and chained my legs to the sides of my bed. Then he knelt between my thighs. I felt my breathing quicken as my bed sagged because it was dark in my room, he hadn't bothered with lights.

"Ready?" he said. I stared at him and shook my head no.

He slapped my face really hard.

" I said, Are you ready bitch!" he yelled. I swallowed my fear and slowly nodded.

"That what I wanted to see" he smiled and lowered himself onto me.

I gasped in shock, the pain was unbearable. he laughed and pushed himself further in. I tried to scream, of course, I didn't. for about another hour or so he slapped me, bit me, licked me and pushed in and out of me till I was bleeding. eventually he stopped and undid my handcuffs.

" Ill see you soon" he left.

I curled up into a pained ball and cried myself to sleep.