Breaking your own heart

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath in. It was a long, hard day of holding in tears and trying to keep my legs steady. I opened my eyes and glanced at my phone. 3 missed calls my phone read. I sank to the ground and curled into myself, this time I couldn't stop the tears streaming down my face. The breath caught in my throat as I tried to breathe in, an ugly sob broke out instead of a steady stream of oxygen. Suddenly a text flashed up on my screen; Niall Horan - 'will you still love me in the morning?' I reluctantly closed the screen. My head fell to my knees, before sobs consumed me, I whispered into the darkness "Forever and ever babe."

Chapter 1:

Ok, let me start from the beginning. I'm just a girl with huge crush. I don't have a thigh gap I don't have that long hair, I'm not skinny I have muscles and you can see my ab line. I am just me. Sure I want to look like Cara Delevingne and Mila Kunis, but lets face it? I will never look like that. I'm quite content in just being me. My name's Addison-Jane and I am in love with Niall Horan. However, I said I would start from the beginning....

"Hush little baby, don't you cry everything's gonna be alright..." I stared at my mum, her beautiful dark hair caressing her careless face, but today there was a dark shadow behind her eyes. Her voice was strained and tainted with unmistakeable fear. I was only 3, yet I could see all this from my childish eyes. My dad was behind the wheel of our jeep, driving way to fast for the narrow country roads. "Smile my darling, don't be shy it'll be better before the morning light.." A strained smile, stretched across her red lips. Bang. Bang. Two shots were fired. Both found its target. The car spun out of control and the last thing I remember seeing was my mums beautiful dark hair stained red with her own blood.

A few days later I was in a hotel room with a man scarier than the events I had watched occur in front of my very eyes. His hair was dark, shiny with the sweat that had beaded on his forehead. His eyes were light blue, interesting considering his hair colour. If I saw him today I would've been starstruck. He was gorgeous. His face though was contorted. Pain and confusion flittered through his eyes. I saw all this. Yet the only thing I actually processed, was the scar running down from the corner of his left eye. It was faint and had only the slightest affect on his face, his eye was slightly pulled in the corner and when it snaked to his lips, they too formed a permanent slip. I had not known in those early days, but this man 'Jasper', he had no other name, was the very same man who robbed me of my parents.

14 years on I'm here. My past is difficult to explain and somewhat unbelievable. The only tangible evidence that those events did occur, was the scars I carried. Unlike Jasper, now deceased, I had tried my hardest to avoid receiving scars on my face. They are always the most distinguishing feature about someone. And for someone like me, that is not a good thing. Right, 17 years old now. I have just been released from my post. Army brat. Lets not go back. I received a call two days ago and have been asked to be security for One Direction. I shook my head in frustration. I don't know who One Direction is! I've been in the field to long I guess.

"Hey, Ryder!" My irritation cleared, "Hey Blade". I replied, shrugging my heavy backpack onto my shoulder.

"It's so weird never seeing a pretty face smile you know" he frowned. "Maybe it wouldn't be so weird if you stopped expecting me to smile. Not everyone has a reason to you know."

Beside me Blade's eyebrow furrowed in sadness, "Huh, I guess when you put it like that", he rubbed his head nervously with his oversized hands. At that I had to smile. Blade stared at me in suprise. I laughed. Now that surprised even me. Blade stared at me with a stunned expression. His eyes reminded me of a deer caught in headlights. I grimaced and ran to my car. "Bye Blade!" I called. He was struggling to compose himself, and I was driving away before he could reply.

A/N

Hey guys!

If you're reading this, thank you so much! It's not very good but you know stories, you want to get the boring parts out of the way first right? Sorry if its a bit of a disappointment, but read on and hopefully you find it more interesting!! Have a lovely night/day! (: