Living With Autism

I've been single most of my boys lives, their dad was in the picture somewhat when they were very little, but he'd decided he didn't want that much responsibility. As my son Diego got older he became a bit too much for his father to handle, and since we weren't married his father decided to go his separate way. His father soon met someone else, got her pregnant and married her instead. He rarely spends time with our son's and hardly pays me anything in Child support and still complains about it. Our oldest son Alessandro is fourteen years old and our youngest son Diego is twelve years old. My son Diego was diagnosed with Autism on the spectrum when he was four and a half years old.

I noticed there was something wrong with my son when he was about one and a half years old, but I wasn't sure. I'd observe his behavior frequently to see how he'd react to noises and people around him. He wouldn't focus on anything in particular; he'd just sit still and stare into limbo. I noticed he would do this often, but my parents noticed these signs before I did and they would ask me if there was something wrong with his hearing. When my parents expressed their concern about my sons hearing to me, I didn't think that was the problem. One day that we all went to my sister's house and I hadn't taken Diego out of his carrier yet, my sister put music on and as soon as it began, Diego started to move and groove to it.

There was no question that my son could hear, but I did get a bit worried because he was so little and dancing so vibrantly to the music. I quickly brushed those thoughts aside, because I recall how his father has a lot of rhythm for dancing and my son is a normal healthy baby. My son didn't receive a psychiatric evaluation until he was much older and until this day I feel very bad for waiting that long, because it put a big strain on both of us. I'll talk more about this as I get further along in my son's story, unfortunately at that time I lived with my parents and I didn't have a lot of support. I had to do things on my own most of the time, I did ask my older sister for advice, but that's the reason I ended up waiting a long to get my son evaluated. I asked my sister, because she works at a hospital and I assumed she would know the best thing for me to do.

My son was two years old at this time and the advice she gave me, was to wait until he was around four and a half years old to seek help for him. I guess she thought it would best to wait and see if he'd get better, or something, so I waited two and a half whole years after that. If someone is not specialized in Autistic Spectrum conditions, or knows nothing about other developmental conditions , it's best not to ask them for advice, even if they around people who are sick.If there is someone in a similar situation with their loved one, or knows someone who is in a similar situation, I hope they read, or share my son's story. If my experience is able to help anyone, then writing this was worth every word. It was now "2002," and my son is now four and a half years old, the time had come to start the process of looking for a specialist to help him.

To see a specialist, the first thing I needed to do was to be referred by a physician, so I took my son to a couple of pediatricians. I explained to them my son's behavior's and how he would barely communicate, both doctors I took him to told me there was nothing wrong with my son, they told me that he would grow out of it eventually and that he was just an energetic little boy. I was upset, because none of these doctors took my plight seriously, but that didn't stop me from looking elsewhere. I was determined that my son receive the medical attention he desperately needed. I knew if I didn't find help soon, we would both end up in a worse situation. I thought if these physicians won't listen to me, I would find someone that would, so I started making phone calls to behavioral centers.

The receptionist at every center I called had me going in circles at first, giving me other numbers of institutions to call. I was not going to give up even if these places were making it difficult for me; I was not going to give up and decided to redial the first one that turned me away. This time I wasn't backing down easily, I was stern and serious when I spoke to the receptionist again and I made sure she was considerate to my request this time. Sometimes this the only to get things done, or even these institutions that exist for the purpose of helping people like my son, will deny and turn people like him away. When I think about it now, I know what I should have done, but it was a long time ago and I was young and I didn't know how to handle these kinds of situations. If I had to go through this issue all over again, I wouldn't stay quiet.