porcelain {anthony kiedis}

little girls from sweden dream of silver screen quotations

fresh puddles of rain water mixed with sludge congregated at the end of each street corner. some dared to slosh though them, others, stayed on higher ground. it was almost as if the clean roads and water like mixture did not want to have contact, like the rich and the dregs of this town. one side of the hollywood hills held mansions and splendor, while the opposite cradled cramped apartments.

and there i was, stuck in the middle of it all.

sure, i never had the chance to become a "star" and all that crap. but i am fine with that. i've always been on the shy side, the lime light just does not do it for me. i like the shadows, haha. but i wasn't about to go and sell my self in to prostitution, unlike some people i once knew in high school.

i pulled my flimsy, ripped jean jacket close around my body, sheltering my self from the on coming winds from up the hill. i trudged on, deciding to take my own way and walk right in the middle of the street. if any one was honestly stupid and heartless enough, they could drive me over, but i was taking my chances today.

i watched the sky turn from bright blue to darker blue, fading out with a cascade of colors dancing along the heavens. in the middle of the road i slowed down, never ceasing my eye contact with the sky. we faintly smiled at each other, reassuring that every thing would be alright in the end. i hoped that he was right, that every thing would be alright.

again i continued my journey across the concrete jungle. for a few moments i forgot what part of town i was in, be fore i was scared shit less.

"lindsey! oh good god in heaven i haven't seen you in a times being!"

ms. balzary called out of her mini food store that she was just beginning to close up. her australian accent was not faded, even after being infected with americanism. i smiled warmy and made my way over to her so she'd stop yelling my name and other information she was willing to share with me. even for being in her 50's, her skin was kissed by the sun, ageless. i really don't know how she does it; whether it's some illegal drug or just her genes, for a 50 some thing year old, ms. balzary was flaw less.

"hi ms. balzary."

i say putting my hands deep in my jean jacket pockets. she smiles over and nods me to come and follow her inside. i do, and proceed to pick up every apple she drops from the crate she was carrying back in side for nights keeping. i placed the fallen fruit back on top and wiped my hands off on my pants.

"thank you my dear, for helping out such an old lady like my self."

she speaks, continuing her work for close up. i follow her around and shuffle my feet.

"no no you don't look a day over 35 ms. balzary! while i am over here, almost 25 and i look worse then you!"

i shouted, not intentionally. the kind old lady shook her head and smirked a wee bit. i picked up a little rose from the vase of flowers and looked aimlessly in to it, smiling to my self in awe of it's beauty. ms. balzary snuck up be hind me and reached her worn out hand to my cheek and cupped my chin, looking up at me.

"my child you are so thin and pale, porcelain like. lind, you look like a little china doll. are you feeling alright?"

she puts her warm hand on my fore head, feeling me for a fever. she takes her hand away and her smile and looks at me worriedly. i return with a stone face of no emotion. we both stand there, unspoken about this strange meeting.

"well i got to go, thanks."

i begin to make my way out the door, be fore she puts a hand on my back.

"please go see a doctor or some one, you don't look good at all."

ms. balzary urges me. with out her seeing, i roll my eyes but leave a cheer full remark that i would see the doctor tomorrow morning and then tell her the news of every thing.