I wish time would have stopped at that moment. Had I known that this would be the last time that I heard those three words. The joyful lyrics she sung to me every morning. Had I known they would be her last... What could I have done?
'I love you...'
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It was one of those cloudy mornings, the ones that would ruin my entire day with just one look. But to see the sun every morning would be a miracle. A miracle that I already had.
She was a shower-time opera singer, and a kitchen country girl. The way she moved her fingers delicately on the strings of my guitar amused me. Just one look at her joyful expressions made my soul hum along with her eccentric tunes.
She would glance at me with a funny face that made me want to laugh at all the ridiculous things I would be upset about. She was the one who knew me well. The only one who healed my shattered heart and kept it safe and hidden in a little box alongside her's.
But that morning was a special one. One that she would never let me forget. With a smile on her face, she would always tell me to learn from my mistakes. But I never did. She would tell me that if I didn't learn now, times would be hard. And she was right...
'Honey, do the dishes for me while I'm out buying food okay?' She said kindly with a hopeful look. Then, after completely closing my bedroom door, I heard her make her way down the stairs and softly shut the back doors. I stared at where she had been standing for 3 seconds, before turning away and focusing on what I had previously been doing. Shutting the words she had said deep inside my head, where I knew they would never come out again.
I was never one to keep track of time, and before I knew it she was already home. As quick as it left me, her words ran through my head. I would always have my heart set on telling her truthfully that I had forgotten. But as always, I let it go. Because my heart would wrench at the sight of the already done dishes sitting on the side to be left to dry. And as she passed me she would smile, not even giving a thought about it.
And once again like every other day, she would leave for work at 5 and always come back at midnight. She worked like crazy trying to keep us together. Our money was tight but she managed somehow. But before leaving she always hugged me, gave me a peck and then told me she loved me. Her words were like a lullaby, soft and soothing, always curing me. And every time, I took these precious moments for granted. As if they would last for an eternity.
Later that night, I received a phone call. It was from her. And my mind had gone blank after I heard the last few words that she barely managed to utter.
'Honey... take care. I love you...' Then there was nothing but silence as I heard the echoing of sirens through the phone. My eyes clouded, and I shut my eyes letting the tears stream down.
I hadn't known when it would end, or more like why it never ended. The hurt and pain that flooded me when I remembered her soft and melodious laughter. She tore the heart she spent years mending in one day. She left me to cry piteously in corner. It was a shock to me when I realized that she had done so many little things. And that they all added up to giving me love in so many ways.
I never heard her beautiful voice again. The one that always brought me joy, happiness and laughter. Instead my days were haunted by the last few words she struggled to let out. My life was completely filled with sorrow, grief and my mind was tainted with the images that I would never see again.
I had let her do the wrong things. And I would never forgive myself for it. I wonder why god ever blessed me with such a loving person. Someone who would give up their saintly soul for wretch like me, who couldn't do a single thing to make her feel thankful.
THE END
