As I looked around me all I could see was a sea of black every person that was present was dressed entirely in black, they were all casting me death stares for following his last wishes. He was lying there in the hospital surrounded by his family who had taken 4 hours after the accident to call me as though his fiancé did not have the right to know what had happened.
He had left for work in the morning at 5 just like he did every morning in the brand new Toyota Hilux we had just brought not even a month ago. Driving along the same road he took every day to go the job he had been doing for two years, which he still hated but went anyway so we could save to build a house. But on the notorious bend that everyone who drove along this road despised there was black ice as that morning there had been a heavy frost. A driver who was driving into town had come across the onto the other side of the road, clipped the side of my baby's ute as he had tried to avoid the car, causing jack's ute to roll down the side of the cliff. The police declared it an accident as the drive of the other car was declared under the limit apparently he blew 0.04 so therefore he was supposed to be safe and clear headed to drive. They said the car was found just two kilometres from the gates at work and about twenty meters down the cliff face wedged against a yellow box gum.
He held out in hospital going in and out of consciousness until I arrived when his grandmother finally decided to call me when I arrived he was just coming out of surgery I had raced to be by his side the trip to the hospital was the worst as his nan didn't tell me anything over the phone I swear I broke so many laws along the way but all I was thinking about was getting to the hospital in time. As I approached his bedside jack had taken my hand and pulled me to sit on the bed side beside him and he said "I will always love you, and wear red."
So here I am standing in this sea of black wearing jack's favourite red dress. With his grandmother looking at me as though I was the most disrespectful person on earth. Only family had arrived by this point and despite the fact that jack and I had been together for over five years and engaged for almost four his family still had not accepted me to the family. I wasn’t worried but it would have been nice if they would at least talk to me and not blame me for his death. Yeah it was me who told him about the job but he applied I didn’t make him, no one could make jack do anything he didn’t actually want to so I don’t see how him having a job that paid so well is my fault. If they wanted to blame someone it should be the driver in the other car it’s not as though I was the reason for the crash. But they would never consider that or my feelings. Not one member of his family came over and said anything to me at all. I am on my own until my family and our friends get here at least then I wouldn’t be the only one not wearing black, as I had asked his friends not to or to at least wear a coloured tie. Jack had hated it when people wore only black ironically he said it looked like they were depressed and going to a funeral.
as I was standing there I was looking around waiting for anyone to arrive then I caught a glimpse of a purple suit, I immediately knew who it was I only knew one guy game enough to wear purple and it was jacks best mate the man who was going to be his best man. As he walked over to me I found myself wiping away more tears I was sure that I had no tears left after the past week but seeing Jim in his purple suit had reminded me all over again of all the plans that jack and I had made for the future including our wedding which had been only three months away. When Jim reached me he pulled me into a bear hug and squeezed.
“How you doing gorgeous?” said Jim whilst squeezing the remaining life out of me.
Jim had always greeted me like that; he was tall and well-built with black hair and just like a brother to me. I had known him since high school almost as long as I had known jack as we had also met in high school. When I didn’t reply he slightly let go but still held me as I broke down into tears for the fourth time today. I was entirely consumed by my grief that I didn’t notice jacks work mates and their significant others walk up to us. Jim let go and immediately Damien pulled me in for a hug, jacks other best mate. Who was extremely tall and slightly on the large side but I have been assured it’s all muscle, every time I hear that I laugh at him and say it doesn’t feel like muscle whilst poking him in the arm. He and jack had worked together damien was supposed to be in the car that morning with jack but he took the day off sick, bet his fiancé was over the moon about that. I don’t like her much she is only with him for the money he makes and he is only with her because he won’t leave her even though she goes out of her way to jeopardise their relationship and manipulate him. When I ask why he won’t leave her he always tells me the something over and over as though he has it engraved in his mind;
