Saturday, April 16th, 2016

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A new therapy thing that's supposed to help me and by putting here will hopefully help others. Great. Sorry about the attitude, I can't stay clean for very long and it's breaking my heart. The past three days have been rough,  I've cut at least four times every day, and my mess don't want to work anymore. Like they ever really worked in the first place. I don't want to live but I cant die. No matter how I try. I try to overdose,  I just get sick. I try to hang myself, it breaks and everyone's suspicious. How do I explain I'm suicidal? It doesn't matter anyways. Fat, ugly, waste of space. How much longer must life go on? Why must we suffer so much? Why cant I just fucking die already?! My parents already took away the most important thing in my life, my girlfriend, so what do I have to live for? I'm nothing but bisexual trash. Ugh. Now I want to cut again. The last ones are still bleeding. Why cant I stop? Dammit, I cant do anything! Someone just kill me now!

Well, what a lovely start to the story of my life, but I never said it was gonna be happy. I don't know anymore, I'm just going to go to bed or something. Until tomorrow.
~Lost Soul

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