Danger in Little Things

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I’m tired and I’m done. I’ve given up so many times, so many times. I don’t want to live anymore. I want to die, I want to disappear. I can’t swallow pills for the life of me, though I want out. Everything’s wrong with me, mentally and physically. I cannot die. I’m stuck in this godforsaken world with nothing to live for and no way out. I’ve written suicide notes countless times, attempted countless times, been in the hospital, facilities, etc. My life’s a lie. I physically cannot die. Why? No one knows. I’ve attempted all forms of suicide and the doctors are stumped. My parents have stopped caring so much, they’ve given up on me, I’m 15 years young and they’ve both started separate new families away from me. I was dumped unto my aunt Clarissa 2 years ago, when it all started. I live in her attic, right above Clarissa’s room; she can hear my every move. Every night I get a body check, and my room is searched thoroughly. I am not allowed any sharp objects, ropes, bracelets, necklaces, hangars, nothing. Anything and everything is capable of causing me harm when you are this desperate. I just want out.

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