Break Heart

part 1

People  was  look around and the teacher won't there won't no teacher and the was one teacher she was leave school and they was go as a question but she leave school before they ask the question and they can't leave the school if they leave they would feel like they are  sad and they will be sad and they feel alone they can't talk if they talk they will be feel like they are crying and people be mean if they get bullied they will be crying and sad they think why I am here they don't know why they here at school and people are mad some people are mad at they will do something and people will do play will a ball and but they can do something else and people are mean so mean I don't like to read and think people I know it sound weird people don't me know what I do at home I do read and write and talk on the phone I don't like people mean to something I don't like to talk and people will talk all the people I don't know all the people I like to talk other people I don't  like people are mean I think every day why I am here I am 13 years old people don't understand me they don't know my life why do bullied other people that my question to all yell so can so answer the question for me if something tell why I will be happy right now i am sad and if like I am alone and people don't what to know what I go to every day I am alone every day people don't help me it not help me at all people I am alone every day I think I am, alone I feel don't care no know about i know my mom care but it don't help me I don't know my dad people don't understand what i go through every i cry every day in side because that how i feel no one don't care how do someone's life i like i do something people don't know what is in my life people your mean don't understand and people are mean sometime people some people some go on at home are they are get judge or some people this people it care and this girl like this boy and this boy like is her and this boy ask her out and she said yes and this girl is happy and he is happy and they talk on the phone a long time and and this girl is tired and he is not tired and she was sleep when she was on the phone people are so mean but she its so tired and people are ask her why are you tired and the girl tell her friends why she like is boy lot and he is very nice and he care and he is worry and she is nice she is happy and she is a good people and she is a sad and she is care about he and he is talk to her and he said I love you and the girl said she love him and he is a nice people and she is a good people and she feel like she sad and she feel like she is alone and she what to cry and  he was asking is every OK and she said I just want to cry and he said why and she said because I never have someone who care like you and you love me lots I don't know how to act because I never have someone like you and people be mean to the girl and her boyfriend help her and she was so happy and people still being mean to the girl the have a fight with this girl and the people was help the other girl and her boyfriend help her he stop the fight and people was her friend and her friend was help the girl out and tell her to help the girl and she was crying and this girl was start it who start the fight and they girl was start a different fight with another girl a this girl was fight this boy and girlfriend was talk to her boyfriend and the girl broke up with him and he was sad and broken heart and she was alone in the darky  she Is something to  her mom was cry because she cut my self and and her mom ask why she did that and she said because I am alone and sad depressed and she go to kill myself because this make her broke up this her ex boyfriend now I am go to kill myself because this girl was doing something to me her ex boyfriend was go do something and he love her some much he was crying so bad the last word was love you and she kill herself because she a bad life and no one understand it and she was a good people and she kill her because everybody bullied her and she was a alone in the dark her mom say her why she cut herself was a people and people was  being mean and people was fight her she hate her life and people was about start a fight with her ex boyfriend and she was cry she don't what to don't what to kill herself people hate her be her ex boyfriend don't hate he love her he is go to kill is still because his ex girlfriend was die and he go to kill is his self because she die and if she die he die need stupid guy slut emo ugly with they said to her mum and dad that it was I still love you. I think feel sad. The only time I feel you is when you sleep. You sleep funny kind of curled up on your side. The worst kind of sad is not being able to explain why it still hurt when I hear on read your name.depression is a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can affect a Person's thoughts. Depression people may feel sad. They may love inbarest in activities that once worp pleasurable. Inombia may able be presart. Depressed mood is not no causality a psychiatric disorder it may be a normal to certain me event. It sucks when you have to pretend you're okay just because u know no one will truly understand your pain. Its hard to forget to someone whom you've imagined spending your forever with. When people bully other people the bullies don't think it hurt they think we don't have feelings but in the wrong we do everyone in the world has a feeling and the people are getting bullied have the feeling of scared or sad or any other feeling just not have. I didn't know want to do anymore I felt like I was alone I would only stay home listening to music all night and call day I never went outside anymore I was scared to go to school because I couldn't turst anyone anymore because I was frighneteh so bad that I would cry myself to to sleep.plus every night when my mom wasn't home I would cut myself until my arm stop bleeding. I wish that school taught kid about depression anxiety self harm and eating disorders and not just bullying because sometimes it's ourselves that make us feel like shit and most people don't get it. I hate getting flashbacks from I don't want to remember. Depression is like a war. You either win or die trying but who would love a girl who cuts herself. 99% of thing you worry about never happen. Its hard when someone special ignores you. Its harder. Just don't Care. I've we got a war in my mind depression is like war you either win or die trying. What is depression like he whispered. It's like drowning except you can see everyone around you breathing. The little girl just could not sleep because her thoughts were way too deep her mind had gone out for a stroll and fallen down a rabbit hole. What people who are battling depression want YOU to know about depression. She was drowning but nobody saw her struggle. Sometime we expect more from others because we would be willing to do that much for them. People look at you and me to see what they are supposed to be and if we don't disappoint won't disappoint us-Walt Disney. Its was when your realize you aren't as important to someone as you thought you were. Would sorry have made any difference does it ever. It's just a word. One word against a thousand actions. Stars can't shine without darkness he was walk down the way if school and people being mean sometimes it's okay if the only thing you did today was breathe. Isn't funny. Cutting isn't funny. Anorexia Isn't funny. Bulimia Isn't funny. Suicide Is definitely not funny. I don't know why you're making jokes about it. Your skin isn't paper don't cut it your face isn't mask don't his it your size isn't a book don't judge it your life isn't a movie don't end it. I would rather be a little nobody than to be a evil somebody. When I was in my room the only thing I kept asking myself is life  worth living was I eye appear to be born why I'm so ugly why am I even here everyone hates me I don't know what I did I was just the new girl who trust to be nice and happy I used to love myself so much but how I don't all I say to myself is that I hate myself that's all I repeat to myself at night and when I wake up in the morning every time I go to sleep I wish that I never woke up but when I wake up I feels like a nightmare. Can't you see that it's not my fault that cell these things happened to me and a week that why I am writing my story before anyone could but meaning I want you to know that sorry mom for not being a good daughter to you but I want you to know that I will always loved find this you  should publish it and beep inside where nothing's fine I've my mind. One day same one will walk into your life and make you see why it never worked out with anyone else. I still fall for you everyday. The world is not what it seems. He told me in you I've found the love of my life and my closest truest friend. Life goes on whether you choose to move on and take a chance in the unknown or stay behind locked in the past thinking of what couldn't been. Just be yourself life is to short to be someone else. In the end only regret the change we don't take.