Never Let Me Go

Chapter 1

There I was crying in the corner of my room again. The room was cold and dark. The words that everyone one had said today. They think that I'm fine and their jokes are funny but their not. They make me feel like shit.

"Bitch... Hoe... Slut... Daughter of a drug lord... worthless... ugly... coke head... addict"

But I'm not any of those. My father is El Chapo, the Mexican Drug Lord. People all me names because of it. They ask me if "I got any weed?" 

How many people did my father kill today."

Everyday it's the same; I won't let them see that what they say gets to me. That's what my father taught me. I'm not sure if I should even listen to him. It seems like every other week he's in jail again. Then he comes back to my mom, my brother, and I. I just laugh off what they say. I don't have any friends in that entire school, and I'm the only Mexican. When I get home I close my door and all the tears I've held in that day come rushing out. 

"Lina!" My mom called.

"Que quieres ahora?"

I run down stairs and meet my mom in the kitchen but before I do I dry my eyes so she can't see I've been crying.

"I just wanted to look at you."

"What?"

"I want to let you know how much I love you. Mi hija tu son mi amor."

"I love you too mom."

"Help me unload the dishes."

I grabbed the dishes and started putting them in the cabinets and drawers where they belong. Once we finished I went back up to my room. I stopped crying and just sat on my bed looking out the window. It's like every time I look out the window I see a world so much better off with out me. Then I see the scars that barry deep within my wrists. "I just want a normal life."

Being the daughter of a Drug Lord doesn't help. For me there is no possible way to be normal. I look at all the other kids with normal parents and think, "Why couldn't I have grown up like them?"

I look at the clock and see that its 5:39 p.m.

Dinner is at 6:00. Papa is back in prison but I am expecting that he will break out again soon. This hasn't been our first dinner without him. 

The time flies fast and we finished dinner. We had quesadillas con carne; it was delicious.

When I got up to my room I got on my laptop and went on my Facebook page. When I went on my page I saw a bunch of comments, again. 

CutieluvEr: she's disgusting

MikeDaboss: hoe

JustinisBAE: pothead

LehLindsay: drug addict

There were more; tons of more, but I didn't want to read them. I couldn't read them. I was on the verge of tears and I hate crying; it makes me feel weak and pathetic. 

Sometimes I just wish I could go to sleep and never wake up.

After I finished all of my homework I took a shower and went to bed. Before I did though I thought about the one thing I think about most in life. Would I ever find someone to love? Mama says I will but no one can predict the future. I probably won't though. Who could love a girl who is the daughter of a Drug Lord?

No one, that's who.