Dedicated to Dreaming_Love, BaDundas, and darkflame
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I had her on my back, my one and only soul mate. She was the only one who could take away my painful memories. The one that made me feel complete and whole. She made me happy, and made me feel that life was worthwhile. Someone who made me feel needed. She was my everything, my future, that was, until she died.
“Can you take me to see the sunrise?” Amelia asked me. Tears streamed down her face and landed on her pillow, leaving her cheeks damp. “Please my darling, I want the sun to be the last thing I see in this life. With you.”
She laid in the hospital bed, looking up at me with her pleading eyes. I held her hand tight and nodded, tears always flowing, like the rain. Something inside me told me not to take her, that she was better off staying and having a chance of surviving. But me, my thoughts and conscience, knew that she wasn’t going to make it. Now not even my love can save her from death’s embrace, nothing can. The feeling that she was going to live was no longer there in my mind. The least that I could do was let her have her wish.
I took her into my arms and I snuck the both of us out of the hospital, and into my Porsche.
I drove off, away from the hospital, away from Amelia’s admitted room. We left behind the flowers that her family had sent for her, but now have withered and died.
Twenty minutes later and we were at the beach, at dawn.
I put a jacket around Amelia who was still in her hospital clothing then carried her in my arms. I walked along the tides of the beach, waiting for the sun to make its grand entrance.
It was a cold morning, colder than usual. I wore a coat over my jumper and t-shirt and a scarf. The bottom of my jeans and my shoes was getting soaked from water. I couldn’t care less though. The love of my life was going to die. I could feel the breeze against my skin.
I stopped walking and faced in the direction of where the sun would rise.
“I love you Padriac,” Amelia whispered. “Thank you for loving me.”
Tears formed and I began to cry, yet again. Emotions and thoughts raced through. Anger, sadness and stupidity.
Anger for whoever claimed my beloved’s life. She didn’t deserve this, and of all people that exist, why does it have to be her? Why?
Sadness, because she was going to leave me.
Stupidity because I met her once, and only once, and couldn’t stop seeing her. My actions led to the both of us at this very point. We’re in agony because now neither of us can live without each other.
“I love you too Amelia. Forever and always,” I said as I turned my head slightly so that I could see her.
Over the horizon the sun crept out from under its blanket of blue. It’s light instantly brightening up the day like a candle in a dark room. The sun made the sky an orange and yellowy colour. The sound of the water was calming. Such a beautiful day it was. So why did Amelia have to die?
“Don’t cry anymore Padriac. You’ve shed enough tears for me. Now it’s time to let me go,” Amelia said and held onto me tighter.
As the sun rose higher and higher, I could feel Amelia leaving me. Her body grew lifeless and limp. And then her arms fell from around my neck on to her knees. I knew she was gone, right away.
“Amelia? Amelia! No, no!!” I shouted with anguish.
I shut my eyes for a moment, seeing the sun’s light through my eyelids. I opened them and walked back to my car.
The memory flashed back as fast as the stroke of an artist’s brush. I can’t believe that after so many months of burying the memories of her, my wall of protection shattered so easily. Everything that I’ve tried to forget seemed to want an existence again.
I looked up at the grey sky, my vision blurred from my tears. I took a deep breath and looked down at the water from the bridge I was on.
This pain is too great for one man alone to bear. I see no point in life when all I did live for, was for her. Now she’s gone and I really don’t care about life, not anymore. My very existence was meant to be with her. How does one live, without their other half?
I walk off the bridge and come across a traffic light. I wait for the light to go green, but during the process a thought passed through my mind. A truck was approaching. I walk onto the road and face the truck. I could hear bystanders yelling and the honking of the truck. I didn’t move. Not an inch. Why would I when I’m already this close to be with her again?
The truck came at a fast speed, the driver pulled the brake but not quick enough. The pain came fast. My ribs cracked, my head took a blow and then I’m on the ground. It hurts, but not as much as time without her. Life altogether is tormenting.
The beating of my heart slowed, and I knew that I was going to see Amelia again. The commotion around me went quieter and quieter. The pain lessened.
“I’m coming Amelia.”
