The Summer I Met You

Promises, Regret, And Unanswered Questions

I sat down to eat. I ate so fast that my bowl was empty and before I knew it I was eating air. Matt sat down next to me as I moved the bowl away from me, clearly showing I was finished. "What happened in there?" He gave me a look of confusion and mischief. I looked at him "What? With Ed?"

"Yeah, you seemed rather uncomfortable when you came out of that kitchen," Matt raised an eyebrow at me. "Nothing happened," I assured him, hoping to move from the topic of conversation yet again. "Okay, I was just making sure, Ed's never really been very good at making friends, he's quite closed within himself if you get what I mean..." I nodded, even though inside there were a million different questions wanting to be answered. What did he mean? Ed seemed fine around people. He certainly got my attention when we met, he was kind, outgoing and respectful. Matt got up from the table before I could attempt to have my questions put at rest. I let him go, not wanting to seem desperate, and then I got up to find Ed.

I went back upstairs in search of Ed. I knocked his door, "Ed? Are you in there?" There was no reply, " Ed?..." I opened the door slowly, peering in as I did so. I walked around, taken in by my surroundings. He didn't have very many photos or posters, nor did he have bright coloured walls, not like my bedroom. What he did have however, was his guitar, sitting in the corner, propped up against the wall.

I walked towards the wall where a photo frame stood, although, it didn't have a photo inside.
"I never really found anything to put in it," Ed said suddenly, catching my attention. "Ed! You scared me!" I punched him playfully in the arm. "Sorry," he said, a sly grin plastered on the corner of his mouth.

"What do you mean you never found anything to put in it? Don't you have any photos of you with your friends?" I asked, I was finally going to get some answers to the questions Matt had placed in my mind.
He looked away, "Of course..." He trailed off, "I have many friends," he looked back at me and smiled cockily. That's when I knew he was lying. I could see it in his eyes.

"Ed..." I paused, not knowing how I was going to phrase the sentence, "you've never had a friend...a real friend, have you?" I locked eyes with Ed at that moment. I didn't see the joy and kindness I had before, instead, I saw sorrow, emptiness and hurt. But above all, he wasn't the carefree, mischievous teenage boy who was eager with the will to live. He looked almost...broken.

His head sank into his hands, his elbows propped up on his lap. He stayed there for a minute, silent with pain. Ed looked up at me, his eyes red.

"I-I-I'm sorry, Ed," I choked out, in between breaths. But it wasn't enough. He stood and walked towards the door...and left.

I sat there, full of regret. But, I was about to do the most stupid thing I could have done in that moment. I went after him. "Ed! Ed! Please come back! I'm so sorry!" I yelled across the hallway. I began running in his direction when Matt came up the stairs, walking in my direction. "What's up with him?" Matt said, referring to Ed. "It's a little...umm...complicated," I suggested, trying to stay clear of the real reason for Ed storming down the hallway.

"Steph...just a warning. Don't be too hard on him," he paused and took a deep breath, "he's a lot more...troubled than you think," Matt finished, looking away before turning to walk down the stairs. "Matt, what do you mean?" I asked, confused. Matt turned to face me from the bottom of the stairs, "I'm sorry, Steph," he paused again, "but it's not my place to tell," he told me, until finally walking away out of sight.

I breathed heavily. I slowly crept down the hallway, searching for Ed. I eventually found him, crouched down in the corner of a small room full of instruments. I knelt down beside him, taking in the sight. He looked up at me, his eyes still red. I knew it wasn't right to force him to talk about it, so I sat down next to him and pulled him down so that his head was resting on my shoulder. I took his hand in mine and we stayed there in silence for what seemed like hours.

"Ed..." I finally said, moving out of his grasp. "Hmm," he replied. "Are you okay?" I anticipated the answer, thinking I had made a big mistake. "...Honestly?...no," he shrugged, trying to make out it wasn't that big of a deal.

"What happened?" I croaked out, worried of knowing the answer.

"I don't want to talk about it," he said, his voice rose as he spoke. He stood up abruptly,  stomping out of the room once more.

I ran after him. "Please, Ed," I caught my breath as he stopped and turned around, facing me, "what is it you're so ashamed of? I want to help," I explained, hoping he'd finally talk.

"What's wrong?" I prompted.

"Nothing!" Ed yelled at me in frustration.

"It's clearly something! Ed, please don't shut me out, I want to help!" I paused, my voice cracked as tears began to trickle down my face. "Please, Ed," I begged, quietly, trying to calm him.

"I can't..." He replied, almost whispering. His body, facing away from me.

"Why not?" I exclaimed, slightly louder this time.

"Because I can't hurt you too..." He paused and turned to face me, tears falling down his cheeks, "I won't,"

His voice trembled as he spoke. What did he mean?
How could he possibly hurt me?

I looked up at him, walking towards him at a slow pace. I brought my hands up to reach his cheeks, wiping away the tears that stung his skin. Tears didn't look right on him. His demeanour, too strong and lean for such a gesture. He grabbed my wrists tightly and my instinct was that he would pull me away and run off again. But he didn't.

His grip loosened. I furrowed my eyebrows in shock and confusion. It was then I realised he was smiling at me, but not a happy smile, a sad one.

He let go of my wrists and brought me into a tight hug. I hugged back, glad with relief.

"Don't leave me...please..." His voice cracked, he held me tighter as if he never wanted to let go. "Promise me you won't let anything happen to us! Th-that you'll always be there for me," he choked out.

"Always,"

Sorry I've taken forever to update! I have a lot of school stuff going on so I haven't had much time to write. As you all know, I've been editing. Not much is different. But my chapters are spread differently. You  also know I didn't intend for my story to take to this scene so early in the book. But it felt right in the moment so I thought I'd put it in. Sorry for taking so long!