Surrounded by a sea full of people but yet I've never felt more alone. I look at myself at times and ask am I the one to blame? Because the common denominator in all my failings is I. Am I not easy to love? I feel as if I love so much, give so much and yet it's still not enough. I put on a mask, I act tough but behind the mask I shed tears, An endless river of tears pouring from the depth of my being. Is my love not enough, am I not enough? I willingly give but they take so much. I love freely but their love or what they think is love comes with a price. I hold back, control my thoughts, I bite my tongue till it bleeds holding in the pain and sorrow I feel. I suffer in silence trying not to step on anyone's toes but the silence is deafening, it encases my mind, it keeps tearing at my soul. I want to break free, i want to find me. I keep searching for myself as if I'm lost, I look in the mirror I see my reflection and I stare...it looks back at me; empty eyes, fake smiles, frown lines. It's hard but I hold on, the storm is relentless, the pressure is building, it's crushing but I won't wilt,for a while I was almost at the brink. Tired of empty promises, supposed love, it's hard but I have to separate myself in order to save myself. Sacrificing my sanity is slowly draining me, my well has ran dry I have to set myself free....free so I can breathe, free so I can see, free...I won't be bound by the love you have for me or I you. I won't be chained by the memories of good you've done, I won't let you hold my thoughts for ransom afraid to speak out of turn, I won't be tied to the thoughts of repercussions. It's my turn now to say what I feel and mean what I say, I will not backtrack. I am finally setting myself free.
