Sixteen, Clumsy, and Shy

Chapter 2: Boy Eraser

Johnny walked out of the library, still thinking about Morrissey. 'Damn, he's good-lookin'!' he thought to himself, 'there's no way a smart, handsome guy like that would ever show any interest in me.' 

As he walked through the school to meet his friends, he thought intently about the features of that peculiar boy: his sparkling blue eyes that gave him heart palpitations, the interesting quiff that made him stand out, his slim and very formal stature... Morrissey was the most beautiful human being he had ever seen; all he could possibly want was to see him again. He realized that Morrissey had taken residence in his heart and his mind... And he was there to stay.

He approached his friends Andy Rourke and Mike Joyce at a lot that had one solitary tree in the center, surrounded by grass, shrubs, and a broken white picket fence. "Hey guys," Johnny said to them quietly, joining the two behind the tree. "Hello," Andy and Mike replied in unison. Mike started to roll up a joint while Andy pulled Johnny aside to talk.

"You alright? You seem different."

"I'm just fine."

"Come one! You look bloody love struck."

"Eh, I just saw this good-lookin' gu- girl in the library, that's all."

"Fuckin' hopeless romantic, she probably didn't even notice you."

"Piss off, Andy. I'm not a bloody romantic and besides, I was noticed." Johnny looked down and away from his friends. "At least, I hope I was noticed," he muttered under his breath. 

Mike called to them from behind the tree, "Come 'ere guys! I got the bloody thing lit!" Both Andy and Johnny shrugged and went over to Mike.

They all plopped down behind the tree and began sharing the joint. As Johnny took a hit, he could feel it enter his lungs, bloodstream, and soon after, his mind, freeing him from almost any sort of natural emotion. But no matter how liberated he felt from life's complexities, Morrissey still haunted his mind. Not remembering where he was or who he was with, he sighed to himself, "I wish he'd notice me." Mike looked over at him, jaw dropped, eyes widened. All he could do was yell, "What on Earth did you just say? Are you a fucking fag?"

"What? Of course not! I'm not a bloody fag!"

"Could've sworn you just said 'I wish he'd notice me.' Only fags say those things, and you know what we do to fags?"

Andy chimed in, "Mike, don't... Not now."

"Why the hell not? He's clearly into guys and needs to be taught a lesson."

Johnny shook his head in disbelief. "Look, I'm not gay. Can we just enjoy ourselves here?" Mike rolled his eyes. "Fine," he stated coldly before taking a hit off the joint, "but I don't want to hear that you're into guys, you got that?"

"Whatever." Johnny stood up pulled a cigarette out of the pack in his packet and lit it before leaving. "See you 'round, boys. I'mma head home." Andy stood up and shook his hand, "See ya', man. Don't get caught." Mike was next, he stopped smoking and said, "Later." Johnny put the pack back into his pocket and started to walk home.

"Some friend Mike is," Johnny grumbled to himself, "so what if I like a guy? It shouldn't matter who I like... I've never even like a guy before until Morrissey... I'm so fuckin' confused, I can't deal with this shit right no-" He paused when he heard giggling from behind him; he turned around a saw a girl, laughing quietly, looking directly at him. "Hi, um..," he began, "Did you catch an' of that?" The girl nodded, and Johnny blushed. "Oh, uh... I'd like it if you didn't tell anybody, I have no idea what I'm feelin', and I don't want anythin', ya' know... Gettin' 'round."

She laughed, "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." I just found it funny since you're supposed to be Mr. Cool Tough Guy. Super into smoking pot, too cool for school, doesn't take shit from anybody and all the girls are super into you. Well, most girls."

"Alright, thanks."

"You're welcome. That Morrissey, he's quite the character. All he did was read and sass the teacher in English Honors today. It was cute, in a strange way."

"English Honors, eh? Ah fuck, Asshole's got brains... I should start callin' him Nerd now." Johnny trailed off into his own thoughts for awhile until he had an idea. "Say, um... Is there still room in your English Honors class?"

"There's one open seat left, why?"

"I'm not very good at English, but um... I was thinking about joining the class to get a chance to see Morrissey more often."

"Well, maybe you should try! There is only one spot left, you know."

"Alright, I will! Oh, uh, what was your name? I'll look for you in class."

"Tina Dehghani."

"Nice to meet ya', I'm Johnny Marr. I'll see ya' 'round school, then. I've gotta get home."

And off Johnny went to his house, wanting the day to end in excitement of tomorrow. Johnny wasn't sure why he felt the way that he felt about Morrissey, but he need something needed to be done about it.