Its like being backhanded and thrown to the ground. It hurts.
Its as if everything you've worked and practiced for means absolutely nothing, because its taken from you so quickly when you pushed so long and hard to get it.
I cried, I admit it. I'm not strong enough to hold the tears. No one was.
They knocked me to the ground, kicking my feet out from under me and watching coyly as my face made painful contact with the ground. It hurts.
But I stood up.
Still crying, still hurting, still feeling utterly defeated, I stood up. I stood up and walked in line to give them a handshake. I stood to watch them celebrate their victory. I stood and watched them embrace glory with smiles on their faces and cries of joy ringing from their throats. I stood.
And that is what makes me strong.
To get up from the ground and greet and congratulate the enemy while crying and hurting and bleeding. To watch with dignity while they received their awards, to clap when their names are called. To stand and watch.
Is true strength.
They beat you, you know that. It hurt like a bitch and still stings when you remember and mourn over your mistakes. And you cried, bitterly.
But you stood.
Whether you were fuming or bleeding, hurting or crying, you stood and took that pain. You respected them by greeting them. You earned that integrity and honesty. You.
And so you are strong.
You stood, even while hurting, and met your enemy with tears on your face. You stood and watched them bask in the glory.
So cry. Cry because its over, cry because you lost, cry because it hurts. Let them see. Let them see the tears on your face as you lift your chin and shake their hand. Show them
That tears are strong.
