Sharp Edges

It was just the click that captured the moment. Nobody ever thinks like I do. A device that can capture a moment, a memory, a story, a life? Why doesn't everyone have one? Why?

I ask myself these questions as I sit on my borrowed hotel bed, camera held above my head, staring at the magnificent device that is my career, my hobby, my life, the sushi roll of me. The camera is me. I am the camera. Though its name is Sigma, and Sigma is a Fujifilm X-PRO1 camera, I am him, he is me. He is Fae. We are one.

But he is all I have. I have the world and my camera and the ever changing homes of Fae Briquelle, (me,) who travels place to place to place to capture memories she could have made. But the world is my only opportunity. All my other opportunities have slowly faded into the background and all the openings for new and exciting things have shut; but thats okay with me, because I'm just me, traveling the world, my only companion a fancy camera named Sigma, and my suitcase. The world is my home, my hotel, my apartment, just a very, very big one, that I pick apart slowly, part by part, plane ride by plane ride, searching my Real. My Real hasn't come yet. My Real is something I've been looking for for a while now. My Real is my life. My life is him, the one the probably doesn't exist, the one that would finally become my first real live companion, no offense to Sigma. My Real is a real home, the home I will leave and come back to happily with my Real companion, and my Real happiness, and my Real memories. I just need my Real, and maybe my Real is somewhere else in this big apartment building called the world. Maybe he's been just down the hall all along. Maybe my Real is late. Not on time. Or maybe my Real decided not to come at all, to skip class like a kid in high school would to sneak in a puff of a cigarette or two. Maybe he thought I failed and forgot about him and our life, maybe he gave up on me. Maybe I was the one that was too late. The maybe's and possibly's were endless. Maybe I'll get up today. I possibly will eat some toast. I might take a picture or two. I could possibly find my Real.