Suicide Note - {Suicidal Louis} Short Story

A Damaged Little Soul

*When you realize it's to fucking late to take back anything in your life.
You just decide to end it.*

-

"Mr. Tomlinson. Why are you in my office again?" The principal asked this stupid question as if he didn't already know.

"You fucking tell me!" I spat back while sitting in one of his office chairs with my arms crossed.

"I don't tolerate words like that in my school Tomlinson! You know that!" He yelled a bit then he sighed and rubbed his temples. "Have you spoken with the school nurse?"

"There's no reason for me to speak with her so no." I asked trying to act like I didn't know what he was talking about while bringing up the nurse.

He stared at me for a little while with a certain face that was... unsure.

"WHAT!" I shouted with an attitude.

"You know why you need to go to the nurse. So she can give you your medication."

I bit my tongue. "I've been talking to the therapist! That should be enough, yeah? I don't need that damn medicine." I told him.

He sat up in his chair. "Louis,... we're just worried about you okay?"

The principal has used statements like this on me before to always end up getting me to fall in the trap of taking my meds, but I've become numb to the whole situation. I stood up from the chair and went to the door and opened it. "You don't have to lie Mr. Walker. Nobody cares. Just let me worry about myself." I said without looking at him then I walked out his door and closed it.

I plugged my earphones in and threw my hood from my hoodie over my head. Why the fuck did he think anyone cares? Why do people think that! I don't even think my own friends care about me anymore let along my family, and you know...it sucks! Fuck this bullshit. I walked out of the school front doors and decided to go see the only person that keeps me sane, my therapist. Her office was literally down the street from where I lived, so on the plus side, after I visit her I can go straight home. I threw my skateboard to the ground and headed my way to her office building.

I hate having this stuff on my mind. You know I go through this shit almost everyday. People pretending to care, pretending to show me love, my own family doesn't even give a damn about me so why would I expect anyone else too?

Arriving to her office building I walked in the double doors. "Hi Louis." The friendly smile spoke to me as I walked inside. The women at the front desk was always nice but I never remembered her name nor did I ever care to. But again, at least she was nice.

"Hi. Is Doctor Rose in? Can I speak to her?" I asked.

"Sure Love. She's in her office. Are you doing okay?" I glanced down the long hallway then back at her and nodded me head. She gave me a side smile with worried eyes but I just turned and made my way to Ms. Rose office.

I knocked on the door and announced who I was when she questioned the knocker. I heard her heels walk up to the door and she opened it. She wasn't to much taller than me but she still kind of was.

"Louis? What are you doing here?" she questioned then looked at her watch. "It's only noon, you should still be in school." she told me.

"I seriously needed to talk to someone Ms...please." I begged and she sighed. Then walked back into her office leaving her door open, allowing me to come in. I stepped in from the hard wood floor to the soft dark brown carpet in her office then closed the door.