I don't complain all the time. I don't go on about all my problems, i will look like im attention seeking. No matter how close my friend is im afraid. There is so much people don't know about me. I seem like the happiest person on earth, i never stop talking. But the only reason for this is so i can take my mind of the problems. I'm not saying i have a worse life than others. But that's why i can't express my self because they might have a worse problem, and i might make it worse. Every time i pause, i all the problems come back and hit me all at once. At night, i cry my self to sleep and sometimes i don't even know why. It's just everything. No one around me has actually noticed when im upset, maybe once or twice. They ask me what's up? What do i say? I say im fine, really or im ok. I'm lying. Before i say it i just want to say everything, to everyone but i don't. I keep it bottled up. I sit and feel sorry for my self pathetically. Maybe i should show my problems, feel down every day, never smile, hardly speak, never stop thinking about it. But then i wouldn't be living would I? I need to remind my self that maybe these problems are part of life, understanding life and what's to come. Just have fun tell they guy, express my problems to a friend. Have you ever actually listened to a song, listened to the lyrics? If you can compare it all to you from the heart then obviously it isn't just a stupid problem you think only happens to you. It's happening to a lot of people and if they can sing about it why not write about it? That's what I am doing. I feel better now. I smile and walk on. Live ever day as if it's your last because it might be. Be awesome, be your self. Love your flaws. They make you individual. Not perfectly skinny? Well good, your not starving your self. Not the prettiest? No, your just not caked in makeup. Not the best at sports? Well i am not. what good will it do you? So what, your not the next Olympic athlete, we can be terrible together. Don't starve your self, don't ruin your self, just don't try and be something your not because then you wouldn't be you. Even if your not the most popular, at least you know your only friends are your real friends.
