Just That

2.

HIS

For an athlete, having a routine is a must, and Jeron likes it that way. He would wake up around 4 am, jog around DLSU for 30 minutes then drill some shots. At about 5 am, he will hit the gym together with his teammates, and they will have their basketball practice until 7 am. At 8 o'clock, he'll be sitting in the classroom and waiting for his class to end around 10 or 11, then he'll have his lunch and meet some friends. In the afternoon, he will attend class again, have his siesta — if his time permits — around 6 pm, he'll be back in the gym with his teammates or Ahia. The rest of the night will be for his extracurricular activities, but during basketball season, he will require himself to do another jog or swim after doing his school stuff, then he'll shoot some hoops before he goes back to his dorm and call it a day. Jeron makes minor changes to his routine to meet his commitments, but practically it goes the same throughout, and it's been almost 2 years since Jeron hated having them. He hates buying his weekly groceries and garbage collection day. He hates to eat ice cream or pizza at midnight and drink hot Choco on rainy days. He hates seeing sticky note pads and the fact that he occasionally needs to wear his reading glasses. Jeron hates hitting the gym at night and jogging around DLSU. He hates playing and not being able to feel her presence at all. He hates everything he once looks forward to; because of her, it reminds him of Mika Reyes.

"Shoti, where should I put this one?" Almira asked, holding his favorite mug. Jeron finally accepted his parents' offer to move back to their home in Quezon City. After all, he missed them, and living separately didn't do any good for him — at least for the past months.

"Dito na yan, dichi," he said, Almira handed him the mug, and it felt weird. It felt strange to hold it for so long because, for a year, he would just simply stare at it or hold it for a couple of seconds to wipe away some dust. Jeron never used it again, lifted it, or changed its position. He kept it in place because she was the last to wash it and place it inside the cupboard. Jeron was trying to save what was left of her in that mug. Yes, he hates everything that reminds him of her, but he can't get rid of them because deep down in his heart, he hopes that she'll come back. That's how much he longed for her. And right there, he knew how much he had invested in Mika, but it was too late.

"How's your draft application?" Almira inquired as she stared at her not so little brother, who's finally trying to live his life the way he desired it to be ever since.

"I'll pass it tomorrow," Jeron answered while carefully setting the mug inside the box that holds many memories of her. The First-year, she's a co-athlete. The next, she's simply an acquaintance. On the third, you start idolizing her, which leads to an attraction (you didn't want to entertain that fact). The year after, she became a friend, and before you knew it, she meant a lot to you already. Unfortunately, she left without a word, and everything came crashing for a reason you don't want to acknowledge.

"You guys okay here already?" Jeric asked as soon as he returned to Jeron's unit. "Ilang box pa ba?"

"Last two na lang, Ahia." Almira replied, carrying the box next to her.

"Sige baba na namin 'to." Jeric mumbled and helped Almira, "We'll wait for you there."

Jeron smiled, and the two left. He stares at the empty room that holds plenty of memories. This was his home for 6 years; it witnessed his every triumph and even his greatest downfall. It housed his brightest and darkest days. He used to feel very safe here, but for a year, his safe place depicted the demons that he never thought he had in him. Jeron heaved a deep sigh as the memories came rushing like the same old days. It's just that this time he can finally stand them and let them vanish when he wants them to. They're slowly losing their power over him.