***this is from a few months ago
A thousand voices screaming my name, a billion people dragging me away and I can't tell if you're one or not. Are you here with me when im screaming? When the crowds pulling me under and throwing me down do you understand how it feels to be trampled like dirt? Is this what you made me for or is there more? I'm so confused and so hurt, my heart is racing and my head is throbbing.. Are you here when I'm slipping away?
Is my head with my heart or am I falling apart? I'm losing you and I'm losing myself. Are you here.. Are you here? Why do I not believe? Youve said a thousand times you're near yet I refuse to believe; maybe I'm only fooling myself. I don't know the difference, I can't tell the truth from the lies. Do I believe or do I doubt? Who are you really? I am so unsure. Won't you find me.. Find me. I seek your face only to find clouds when I wish for the sun. You say youre everywhere yet I don't feel you here. Are you real? I am so weak to doubt yet you are so strong... Am I yours because I'm not my own? This life is a wreck won't you consume? This life is yours.
