Like you

what are you waiting for, someone could love you more

Tw/// mild self harm but only for a small part. There is a warning so you can skip that part.

Phil and Daisy had moved to Manchester in a small house, they talked about kids and they had two dogs: Bear (who is Phil's chain. The thing he held on too and clutches in the middle of the night when he's missing his actual bear. Dan.) And Champ. Phil quit YouTube and got a job as a professional film maker. Daisy and him had a healthy sex life and they had a perfect life, hardly fought, and had quite a lot of money. Everything was perfect. They had a perfect life. Perfect. The dream life, something Phil had wished for for the longest time. Absolutely perfect.

He hated it.

He spent his days checking his old soulmates social media, seeing if he was okay and well. And he was.

Dan had continued YouTube, starred in some movies, and even picked up art and made designs for snow boards or t-shirts or websites. Worst of all, he had a boyfriend. His boyfriend was beautiful with the perfect curly dark red hair that was almost black styled into a messy fringe/quiff. he was paler than Dan and was Australian. His name? Phil swore this hurt the worst, it shouldn't, but it brought memories like no other. His name was Dyl. A shortened version of Dylan. What a coincidence.

__________
"Hey love?" Phil called down the hallway to his absolutely beautiful wife Daisy.

"Um... In the bathroom. Can you come here a second?" Daisy awnsered back with concern evident in her quivering voice. Phil quickly walked and he really hoped nothing was wrong. He stopped in the doorway and his hands covered his mouth.

Bear, of course. It had to be the only thing who could make him happy anymore.

"Call the vet!" He exclaimed, Bear was bleeding and whimpering. Phil began to cry. Not Bear. Anything but Bear, please.

_________tw_______
The year was 2009, they were at Dan's house. Phil was pressing a towel to Dan's bleeding and cut thighs. It was Phil's hair towel, he was just out of the shower.

"I did - I didn't think it would be that bad. I thought I could... Do something before you came out." Dan said. He wasn't crying, he was just sitting there blankly, stoking Phil's cheek while he cried.

"Bear, I thought this was over? You were doing so well. Why?" Phil asked.

"I'm glad I've got someone like you." Was all Dan answered with, and Phil couldn't have been happier.

_____tw over_____

Phil pressed his hands to where Bear's bleeding source was, it was on her stomach in between her legs. Daisy was frantically calling the vet and they were told to bring her in immediately. So Daisy drove, while Phil made sure Bear stayed awake and tried to handle the bleeding with a towel.

•
Once in the vet they waited. And waited. And waited. And waited. And waited. And waited some more. And waited. In the end, they left with with eleven dead puppies and a stitched up Bear and a very small, brown puppy with beautiful brown eyes that held the universe.

•
Daisy was done. She'd caught to that empty longing look Phil had developed in his eyes and she too, despite her absolutely perfect life, wanted something more. Their love was so plain, empty. Their love was black, but not in the comforting sense that was Dan's black.