The Paper Airplanes [bxb]

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I dunno if anyone has this in your library/are still reading because it's been like nine months but heyy its me, Kira (the author)!

I'm just so so so so overwhelmed by all the support The Paper Airplanes is getting. I'm not even kidding, I didn't expect to get over 100 reads when I began.

I've suffered from depression for a long time, many people have made me feel worthless and like all I'm good for is being the laughing stock. I've starve myself, I throw up what little things I eat, and I cut my arms and legs until I feel dizzy. So in late July/early August of 2015, I attempted suicide. I just felt like I had nobody here for me and that I was better off in hell.

I stabbed myself in the chest with my mother's kitchen knife.

But unfortunately I missed my vital organs, and the doctors were able to stitch it all back up. I had a lot of recovery and rehab to do, though, so they made me stay in the hospital for a while longer (not to mention the mental hospital as well). During that time I was just disappointed that I'd failed to die, and I was really frustrated that there was always someone watching me in the hospital to make sure I didn't try and do it again.

So- I don't know what for- but I wrote a story. It was about a girl who killed herself and everyone around her didn't even notice she was gone. My therapist read it and told me I was sick (thanks but I already knew). But writing made me feel better, it was some sort of outlet that I could force all of my frustrations through. And I told her that.

So she told me that nobody wanted to read what I wrote, because it was sick and twisted and "disgraceful". But, she hypocritically added that she only wanted me to be happy, and encouraged me to write stories... as long as I threw them out so nobody would read them.

#suchsupport #10/10besttherapist

I was oddly inspired by that, and wrote a story about a boy who wrote a letter to an imaginary person explaining the details of his life, and then he would make it into a paper airplane and throw it to the window.

I wasn't satisfied with it, so I threw it away (as promised).

And I wrote another story off the same plot, about a boy who wrote anonymous love letters to a classmate, and fate led the classmate to read the letters. Only, the boy ended up committing suicide and the classmate never knew his name.

This one I was somewhat satisfied with, so I quickly copied it onto my phone before throwing the original away like I promised my therapist I would do. I published the copy to Wattpad as the story you all now know as The Paper Airplanes.

To be honest, then, I believed my therapist with all my heart that nobody would like what I wrote and that I was just a sick and twisted child whose writing was sinful and needed a douse of holy water.

But no. It has 11k reads, and that means so much to me. People read and acknowledged my writing for once and that made me happier than anything the therapists could ever try and do. (Note that I did write it in the hospital and I was kind of high on all the medication so some of the scenes probably made zero sense)

I ended up being discharged in late December right in time for the holidays, but I still have depression and anxiety pills and crap. I still starve myself and force myself to throw up a lot, but I don't cut as much anymore now that I have something else to occupy me.

(Sorry for the rambling)

Anyways, thank you all so much for reading. This book was supposed to end with the boy dying and Jonah carrying on. That was the end.

But in the back of my mind I think I related myself to the boy, and related Jonah to life. I had hope in life, but life didn't even know me, and then rejected me when I was being beat. So I killed myself, and life turned its back on me and carried on.

Buuut I survived (somehow). So who would I be to create this character that represented me (as a male but whatever), but kill them off and have that be the end?

INTRODUCING the sequel to The Paper Airplanes! I think it can very well just stand alone as its own book, but it happens 1-2 years after TPA and it's basically about the boy coming back and reuniting, if you will, with Jonah :)

So, if you wanted a second book/if you wanted more updates to this story/if you're bored and want a BoyxBoy story to read, go read The Black Hoodies :3

Here's the link~!
http://my.w.tt/UiNb/EbUcqZTxot

I hope you enjoy it!