I feel the blade glide across my wrist, as the blood drips I notice all my worries vanishing. I feel at peace. I am no longer angry. Sometimes I wish I wouldn't be hated for my looks. But when your emo all of that doesn't matter anymore. Sometimes I would just want to end my life to stop all the hurt. When people found out I was emo, girls seem to like me more and I became less hated. It made me happy.
I became emo when I was 15. I went emo because I was getting called names. I acted like it was funny but at home I felt dead inside. That's when the first cut was made. At first it hurt. Then the pain faded away and so did the my hurt.
When I found my girlfriend I was happy. Then my best friend turned around and told her to leave me because I wasn't good enough for her. I told her if this is what she wants then she can leave. 2 weeks went by and I got a text saying "i'm sorry, I didn't want to leave you. I miss you. Please come back. Will you go out with me?". I said "yes", and it made me happy. I was mad at first but then I realized don't hold a grudge at someone you love.
Then after breaking up and getting back together, We finally stayed together and became happy. We had sex a few times. I find out a month later she is pregnant. I was so scared I didn't know what to do. Then I accepted I am going to be a dad. Two months after that I get a call saying "I am sorry, but I lost the kid.I hope your not mad." I told her "I'm not mad, I'm just upset because I was ready to become a dad." She cried for a while.Then I held her in my arms and said "Everything is going to be OK. I promise." I made her feel better.
On a Sunday my parents sat me, my little sisters, and my little 3 year old brother down and said, " We are sorry but we getting a divorce." I got upset then realized it's better for them to be happy and divorced than together and fighting.
In the end, my life has its ups and downs but overall its and OK life......for me.
