Shingeki no Something

Notice me, Heichou!

Message from the Author: First of all, I don't know if I should use author or authoress; Second, this is one of the random things I thought of in class; Third, I want you to make a bet on WHO the narrator might be. Be honest and comment it~!

Enjoy. (and mind pointing out any spelling or grammar mistakes, I'd appreciate that)

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

This isn't much, really. Just some mental journal for myself, because no matter how hard I try or whatever simulation I run in my head, I just can't get myself to confess.

I don't really have any problem with that though, I mean, I live pretty close to him. He notices me too, and treats me better than those around him. Secretly, I've seen him smile at me once in a while, and I can't help but be happy myself.

We go out on expeditions together almost all of the time. I accompany him through his travels as he saves his 3D maneuver gear's gas. Whenever a titan appears, I get really scared, not for myself, but for him. The titan wouldn't bother eating me, since I wouldn't satisfy it's appetite. We would go, or should I say run to a place where the 3D maneuver gear would be of use. He'd go off and attack the titan as he ordered me to get away.

I hated it.

I feel so scared. I'm well aware of how many suffer... how many die in each expedition. What I fear is he would return lifeless, or even worse, nothing would be recovered at all.

I don't like that side of me... doubting his skills; he's a great soldier, there's a reason why he got such a high rank, and that is because of his effort and strength. Yeah, I run and think of the good things. He'll live, and I would just have to keep running. Not too far, not too close, and wait for him to call.

Well, getting back to whatever topic... uhm... retreating from the expedition after a job well done or a failed operation. He would go to me... okay, that's a lie, I would go to him and carry him on my back. He doesn't try to show it, but he's actually exhausted, I could hear his slightly rough breathing...

W-well... this may seem a little too daydreamy, a-anyway... I feel very light or calm whenever I feel the heat of his body on my back as he rides me. I make it so that it wouldn't be obvious that whenever I feel him, I just want to go so fast out of sheer happiness. His hands were rather rough at times, but it's actually quite cute and small. When he caresses my hair gently, I feel calm. When I feel his legs brush on my sides or thighs, I feel weak on the knees. I know there are others around, but I try not to make my emotion too obvious like what he does regardless of being tired.

I start to get a bit fidgety when I notice him unsheathe his blade, I would look ever so slightly towards his direction and expect him to do it quickly, like he often does, and he did. I would try my best not to flinch as he gets back on and thrust his blade back in.

While we keep moving, he would bump me faster as I try go on, and the ground makes louder thud like noises… even though my body doesn’t hit it.

Well that's the general routine. I know some of you think wrongly, but even in his predicament, he's still clean! He keeps himself clean...

We would get back, probably wash ourselves. There are times he would give me a bath and I feel... very embarrassed.

Now for something slightly unrelated... I dunno. I feel jealous when people flock around him, I mean, yeah sure they admire him too, but I can't help thinking they would have a better chance with him, considering how long they've known each other... especially his fiancée Petra. I can't hate her though; she's really nice, even to me. Honestly, I like her too, next to Heichou... I still remember... I saw him look back when her body was thrown away... my mean side felt happy, but remorse and pain is what overwhelmed me... I'll miss the food she gives me and the way she treats me... it even took a while for me to realize that Heichou himself was hurt.

Oh wait! I'm sorry, things turned a little too... dramatic.

Well, yeah... that's about it. Only Eren was left behind from his squad, and those who visit them are friends of Eren, that glasses girl, or the commander.

I don't know where this is going anymore.... hmm... well that's about it... again...

I just feel lucky or happy, or whatever that feeling is, and I wish that there would come a time he would realize my feelings for him... and I'd be the happiest horse there is!

Final note~! If ever I have the chance, I’ll become human like Jean!