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The TARDIS. Time And Relative Dimensions In Space. Specifically the Type 40 Time Capsule owned by the Time Lord Renegade, the Doctor. Have you ever wondered why he became 'the Doctor' and left his home planet, Gallifrey, behind? Stole a TARDIS and flew away? You don't? How the fuck do you not!? It's literally mentioned in every couple of stories...! Anyway, you don't? Well I'll (Reluctantly) tell you. The Doctor ran away because he was bored of it all. Bored of Time Lord Society and everything that came with it. What was boring about it, though? What parts of it made him leave? What's so bad about the Time Lords...? Erm... This is usually the part where the titles play. You know, the 'Doo, dee, doo... Doo, doo! Dee, doo, doo! Doo, dee, dee!' and the vortex thing with the Doctor's face in it... God sakes, have to do everything around here... Here we go, roll the titles! (Title Sequence)
Inside the TARDIS control room, the music of 'Beethoven' echoed around as the Doctor sat on his rocking chair with his feet up reading a Comic, but we cannot name it for copyright reasons. Paul jumped up next to him holding a giant book with the seal of Rassilon stamped on its front. The Doctor didn't even look up from his comic when he said, "Oh, hello Paul. What have you got there?"
"It's a book!" Paul didn't smile as he was a Cyberman, but if he wasn't, he would.
"I'm not an idiot, Paul, I can see it's a book! What book is it?" Paul was somewhat confused, how could Sassy see it was a book if he hadn't even glanced at it?
"It's called 'The Handy Guide to become a Time Lord'. Is it yours?"
"Probably, might have picked it up... Somewhere. So you're interested in the Time Lords, are you?"
"Not the Time Lords themselves, just how you become one. Because I know that Time Lord is a rank, not a species, so you couldn't have been born a Time Lord" "Yes, I wasn't. I was born a Gallifreyan, our original title before Omega granted us the power over time. What does the book say?"
"It says a lot of things, but it's all a bit jumbled. You see there's like seven chapters, like Chapter 12 'The Looms' but then there's one that talks about 'The Children of Gallifrey'. What does it all mean?"
"It's talking about the different cannons" The Doctor then stood up and clicked buttons on the console, trying to look clever.
"Different what?"
"Cannons, my dear Paul"
"What are cannons?"
"Cannons are the different versions of something that still take place in different universes. Sometimes, though, they can be retconned to suit the current cannon and/or dimension"
"Okay... Doctor, can you show me how to become a Time Lord, please?"
"Why?"
"Erm... I don't know? Because you're kind?"
"Come on, you're gonna have to try harder than that"
"I dunno... Maybe because.... I look up to you and I admire you so much that I want to try and learn as much as possible?"
