Just Friends

Prologue

I couldn't stop. 

Honestly, I don't think I could even if I wanted to....

     My fingers are numb and my heart keeps taking over; deciding what I should do. As if my mind was nothing more but a mere extension of my body. All sensible logic lost in a matter of moments. At such a time what should be done? Actually, shouldn't the question be what can be done rather than what should be?

I want everything to stop.

    Do you know what it feels likes to have your heart so crushed? Do you know how it feels to finally have found someone that you can tell everything to and can feel so free with, someone whom you want to love yet you can't... The fact that everyday they are there, standing within reach, but at the same time so far away?

I wish it was easy...

     Its been five years since I last let someone in, since I started to trust again. I can't decide whether loving you was the biggest mistake I have ever made or the best thing thats ever happened to me in the past few years. You taught me to give people a chance even though it might hurt. You taught me how it was like to have fun again and how it was like to let loose. You taught me how to love again... In the short span I have met you, I've experienced more happiness than I have ever had with multiple people combined who I have known for years.

However...

     Why is that? How are you capable of doing such things? Who gave you the right? What makes you so special to be given that power? Who gave it to you? 

Who gave you the power to make me feel everything and then make me feel like I'm nothing?

I hate you so much. I hate you with all my heart that such passion couldn't compare to the heat of a blazing flame. Those are the words I want to say...haha...but I can't...

I love you idiot.

But, I'm going to move on...even though I know I'll never love this way again...

Goodbye,

Your Bestfriend