LOST IN TIME
My name is Ella Rose Adams. When I was seventeen I was murdered. I have been dead for almost a year now but I'm stuck. I’m not in heaven or hell, I’m somewhere in-between. I watch as the lives of my friends and family carry on. I wish I could tell them what really happened that horrible night a year ago. But no, he gets off scott-free. He took my life away but carries on as if nothing ever happened. You know it’s true; we do really crazy things for the ones we love.
I don’t really know what to call it where I am. It's like I’m still living but I’m just an observer now. I watch my mother, Mary, cry at night and scream in pain begging God to give me back to them. My younger sister, Rebecca, used to be the most energetic eight year old I knew, now she just wanders around like she doesn’t know what to do. My Father, Derik, has gone into over-drive with work; it’s all he ever does now. We use to be so close with each other, now they don’t really talk. It’s painful watching my family disintegrate. It’s like they have lost contact with their inner-selfness.
Lisa, my best friend, is now the queen bee of the school. They held a memorial for me in assembly a week after I died. Lisa acts as if she’s fine but I know that it’s all an act. At home Lisa locks herself in her bedroom, tears welling up in her eyes as she glances over at our prom photo. All I want to do is hug her and tell her what really happened. We look so happy in our prom photo. Lisa, her boyfriend Jack, Zane, the love of my life, and me are all laughing. Those were the days when everything was fine and dandy.
Zane he seems to be the only one who isn’t affected by what happed, mind you he does know the truth about what happened to my considering he was the one who took my life away from me. To think I wanted to marry him and spend the rest of my life with him. Zane got into drugs, and that was when everything turned to custard.
Zane would get high and that’s when he lost it. If I didn’t do what he wanted he would punish me by hurting me. I couldn’t leave him though I loved him with all my heart. Love can blind us sometimes; we hide the truth and act as if everything is fun, when it’s not. I learnt that the hard way. I only wanted to please him. He was the best thing that had ever happened to me in my life and I didn’t want to lose him, I felt complete when I was with Zane.
One night he was really high and we were going out for a picnic dinner under the stars in the field east of school. Things were going great until I mentioned the drugs. He shoved me up against the tree with his hands around my neck. The fury and rage in his emerald eyes was frightening, but at the same time he looked so lost and in despair. Everything started gong fuzzy and I felt dizzy. Was this how my life was to end? I thought, in the hands of the one I loved? It was sad when I looked into his eyes for the last time. When I took my last breath I saw all the pain in his life, I wish I had known. Maybe I would still be alive, if only I knew. He may have never started doing drugs. Then life would still be the same.
