Chapter 1: If Only

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Here in the four walls that held most of my memories since the first time I opened my eyes as a child...And possibly the last time I will be until I draw my final breath and move on to the next phase of my life.

It never felt this empty.

It's funny because, who would've thought the emptiness could actually suffocate you?

I miss feeling like the house is too small to hold those you love, the feeling of thinking the house is too small for you-But now...

It feels so damn empty as if I'm the only person in the world.

"Juri can barely lift Biscuit off of the couch!"

"Argh, can too!"

"Can not!"

"Kids, please...We all know both of you can't lift anything for your lives so-"

"Mooooom! That's only Juri...."

'Hey, Jurrriiiii!"

" Ju-RI..."

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"EARTH TO JURI!"

"H-Huh?" I opened my eyes and looked at the person in front of me. Ara?

"Freaking hell-I thought I lost you back there. You've been spacing out for a whole minute! It worried me!"

'Oh, right..I was at work with Ara..This is no time for this, Juri.'

I sighed and shook my head, placing a hand over my forehead. "It's fine Ara-I'm fine. I'm sorry if I worried you like that...I was thinking about something."

Ara looked at me for a good ten seconds, squinting her eyes at me as if she could see right through my mask. After thinking she would bring it up again to asking what's the truth, she only sighed and shrugged her shoulders.

"Whatever-But hey! There's like a new freaking movie that shows tonight! You should come with me."

"Let me guess...Another one of those vampire movies of yours, yes?"

For as long as I could remember, Ara has been a big fan of vampire stories, may it be about documentaries, films or written stories-Heck, don't even get me going with how much she crushed on Edward Cullen during the peak of the Twilight saga movies. Since then, I've been accompanying here to all of those movies despite not really being a fan of them. Sigh, the things I do for love.

"Pleeeeeeaseeee, I'll treat you to dinner! I don't wanna watch this alone! Last time I did, I slapped someone else's arm thinking it was yours-It was embarrassing!"

I chuckled and grinned.

"Alright, fine. Since you've been doing me favors I asked of you earlier, it's time I pay them back."

"Yaaaay! Alright! I'll pick you up at your house an hour and a half for now, momma has got to do some bitchin'."

"You mean getting ready? Who needs an hour to get ready when you're only watching a movie? IN THE DARK?"

"Oh shush~ Who knows who we might bump into-"

"A creep?"

"Ugh, way to ruin the mood, Juri." Ara said and rolled her eyes. "This is for real. Maybe I'd meet the love of my life-You'd never know-Oh! Maybe you could meet yours too!"

I doubt that.

"So be sure to dress up and put some light make up on-I mean...Not that you need it to look good- You are already breath taking as you are but still.."

"Alright mom, I hear you loud and clear. I'll see you later." I leaned in and wrapped my arms around her petite figure, giving her a warm hug.

"I'll be waiting for you out front."

Ara rolled her eyes again and chuckled as she slowly pulled away.

"You better or I'll show you hell next week when we get back to work. See you!"

I smiled as I waved goodbye at her watching her as she walked to her car.

'Whelp, time to walk home then.'

The house is not too far from here. After making sure Ara got in, I turned to the opposite direction and walked home with my earphones plugged into my phone, listening to some music my father used to listen to on a daily basis.

Today was a chilly yet calming night. The stars looked amazing as well, the sounds of laughter and stories from every neighboring houses were somehow deafening despite it being not that loud.

I felt envious. How I wish to go back to that time.

My mind was full of wishes and memories that I didn't notice that I was in front of my house.

Back then, I would come home with a hopeful smile on my face as soon as I step in. My mother who is an angel in disguise would welcome me with a smile and a hug. The aroma of freshly cooked dinner filled the house, and the voice of my brother and father cheering on the football game through the tv's screen.

For a moment, I thought I saw it through my eyes but.... No one's here other than me. No lights are open and no one's waiting.

'Wake up, this is your life now Juri.'

I sighed and unlocked the door, pushing it open to reveal this empty four walled structure looming so darkly at me.

"Catch me if you can!"

"Arf arf!"

"Oh no! The great Jonghyun has captured me!"

I could still remember it as if it had only been a day. Snap out of it.

I shook my head and closed the door behind me, going straight up to my room, afraid to look anywhere else that would remind me more of them: My family and my dog...

"There's no use, Juri..You have to accept that they're gone."

I mumbled as I entered my room-What used to be mine and my twin brother's room to be exact..

But now, it's just me. His stuffs are still here, untouched-Just like how he wanted.

"Sniff..." Before I know it, I let it get to me again as I teared up.

"M-Mom...Dad..." I went down on my knees as they shook. I felt so weak to move on.

"If only I could exchange my life for your lives...I would've done it in a heartbeat....I'm scared."

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