Halfway

Do I Have To Change?

Am I really supposed to be like that? I'm already fifteen. I'm seriously wondering when does teen-stuff will kick in. I still enjoy cartoons. I still play video games...hold on... I LOVE video games. I have liked "this" ever since I was small. Am I really sure that I'm mature enough for my age? I see my classmates and they are all up in the "teen stuff". They scream over every single thing and it's not even worth their time . They talk about marrying the people that they like, which is so weird for me. How can they possibly marry a famous person (No offense) but I don't see the logic in that. I look at the exact same picture that made them scream so much that I had to leave the room and I didn't feel anything. No screaming. No swooning. No crazy declarations of love. No friendships broken because both girls like the same guy. Well, no broken friendships for me 'cause I technically have no friends. *sigh*

"Come on Megan, think positive. You have friends like... your sister...your parents...your cousins...that girl you bumped into at Starbucks the other day... the girl you chatted with in the elevator, and um... forget it. I'll just go back to the classroom. I just downloaded the full season 3 of Avatar. Can't wait to watch it again."
I really want to fit in or maybe at least have someone to talk to. I can try to be like them maybe? I can't believe I have to decide by today. I tried listening to the music they like. I don't know how to feel about it. I don't hate it. It's just I don't really LOVE it like they do. I really don't feel comfortable with fangirling over THAT guy. I don't really "like" the guys that they like. I think they're just boring. I don't see the hype.  Even if I don't like it, I have to if I want them to be my partner. Is this what every girl has to go through to become an "adult"? Stuck here in between childhood and adulthood feels so weird. Do I have to drop everything that I loved as a kid to be considered as mature?  Is this why all my classmates seem to ignore me?  Am I supposed to-WHOAH!!!! "I'm so sorry I bumped into you, I was a bit distracted. Here let me help you pick up your stuff."