Seven Weeks to Forever (Love / Romance)

Chapter Twenty-Four

"What is wrong with me?"

I kick my shoes into a corner in the foyer and drop my purse on the floor. The question repeats over and over again in my mind as I walk into the living room and collapse onto the sofa. Letting Riley get attached to me is a disastrous idea on its own, seeing as I'm going to up and die on him in three weeks. It would be bad enough to leave it at that, but no, I have to go and let myself fall for him, too. And not just the silent, pine-from-afar-crush kind of falling for him. Oh no. I have to blurt out something that tells him exactly what I'm feeling, because that's going to make it easier when I'm gone.

"I am beyond hope," I mutter. The way my words bounce along the walls, it's as though the room agrees with me. Terrific.

I'm also tired. No, make that exhausted. Scratch that. Depleted. I am entirely depleted and having a hard time believing this isn't all some horrible mistake. I let my eyes close and lean my head against a throw pillow on the sofa.

"None of this is a mistake."

My eyes pop open when I hear Noah's voice. He's sitting in the antique armchair in the corner, holding his fedora in his hands and fighting a smile. He's smiling? Not cool.

"I don't remember inviting you to my pity party." I sit up again, grabbing the throw pillow and hugging it close to my chest.

"I don't recall it being acceptable for a higher being to have one," he says.

"If you're looking for a higher being, she's lost somewhere in the middle of a complete catastrophe."

He sets his fedora down on the table beside the armchair. "What makes you think that?"

There's nothing else to think. I'm falling for Riley and he knows it. It's hard enough for me to admit it to myself, let alone Noah, and I can't quite get the words to form on my lips. I don't need to, though. Noah is reading my thoughts.

"Why is that a bad thing?" he asks. "It's good for you to open yourself up and feel again. You know as well as I do that it's been a long time."

"Because he knows," I answer. If I hold the throw pillow any tighter, I'll probably rip it open.

"And?" He tilts his head to the side, watching me. I feel like I'm being examined under a magnifying glass. I have to look away.

"I think he might feel the same way." I barely hear myself speak.

The crinkle in Noah's forehead tells me he's thinking about something. I can only hope he's coming up with a solution for this spectacular mess.

"I can't see how any of this is bad," he says after a minute.

"You're joking, right?" I ask.

"Not at all."

I draw in a breath, trying to hold it the way Amarleen has us do in class when she wants us to relax. It doesn't work. My mind is reeling, and I can't figure out what Noah doesn't understand. I focus my eyes on him.

"My time here ends very soon, and I'm letting him get attached to me. How is that not a mistake?"

Noah stretches his legs out in front of him, crossing them at his ankles. It must be nice to be so at ease in a crisis.

"He needs to fall for you and open his heart, so he can develop his energy enough in this life to get to The Life-After. You know that, and you know he'll die if you don't make that happen." He sounds very matter-of-fact. "You're doing exactly what you should be and letting your instincts guide you. Trust what you feel, instead of what you tell yourself is right and wrong when you overthink it later."