Coming Home

Chapter 18

Cayden’s POV

“Why did you cheat on me?”

Those six words swam in my head, not quite processing. I knew it was only a matter of time before she asked that question, but I was trying to avoid it for as long as possible. I knew my answer to this question wasn’t a very good one and I knew there was a possibility that the answer would hurt her almost as much as the original act did, but I also knew that she’d want the answer anyway. Kenzi’s always been like that. She wants the truth, even if it hurts. That doesn’t mean I was eager to give her the answer.

“Please don’t make me answer that,” I begged, looking into her eyes.

I wanted to rewind time. Ten minutes ago, her eyes were shining with happiness and gratitude. Now they were filled with sadness and hurt and I couldn’t stand to look at that. Seeing that look in her eyes made my heart break. It hurt even more knowing that I was the one to put that look there.

“I need to know Cayden,” she stated, her voice stern despite the tears gathering in her eyes.

“You’re not going to like it,” I said, desperately trying to get her to change her mind.

“Cayden. Tell me,” she commanded and I knew there was no way I was getting out of this.

I took a deep breath, looking anywhere but at her. I knew I had to look at her while I told her but I didn’t want to watch the hurt that I knew would increase as I told her.

“If I’m going to tell you, then I have to tell you everything. After you left that night, Liam and I played video games for a little while and then he had to go home. Not long after he left, Tristan walked through the door. As you know, I hadn’t seen him in a while so we grabbed some whiskey out of the cabinet and were hanging out and talking. Somehow, we got on the topic of you and me and Tristan jokingly made some comment about you being the only girl I’d have for the rest of my life and I got scared. I knew I loved you. Hell, I loved you more than I’ve ever loved anyone in my entire life. I knew I’d do anything for you and I was certain I’d give my life for you and that really scared me. I was eighteen. That’s when most guys are being stupid and figuring out what they want. I already knew what I wanted, I had known since I was ten years old. It scared me how much I loved you. And then Tristan called Brittany and she came over, bringing Ashley with her. I went up to my room and I called you because I needed something to get my mind off the fact that I was scared out of my mind and I knew you were the perfect one to do that. You didn’t answer and then Ashley came in my room and, I don’t know. I needed to get my mind off of everything and she was there, hitting on me so I went with it. It was stupid and I’ve regretted it every day since, but I can’t change the fact that I did it,” I explained, watching the expressions cross her face.

She was silent for a moment after I finished talking. Tears were slowly rolling down her face and I wanted to reach over and wipe them away, but I knew that would be a very bad idea. All I could do was sit in front of her and wait for her to say something.

“So you cheated on me because I was sleeping and I didn’t answer my phone. That’s nice Cayden, real nice,” she said harshly, swiping the tears away and pushing to her feet.

“No! I cheated because I was a stupid eighteen year old kid who couldn’t keep it in his pants,” I corrected, trying to make it better but in all reality, I probably made it worse.

“That makes it so much better Cayden. Thank you so much for that,” she said sarcastically, venom in her voice.

She stood up and spun on her heels, heading for the front door.