My Thoughts at Two

Heart Without a Beat

I couldn't help feeling the adrenaline in my blood when I first took her hand in the moonlight.

The scenery was so exquisite, it left me breathless. The still, clear water in the moonlight painted a precise picture of the perfect scene. The air was a crisp, yet pleasant cool that could be considered contradictory. You loved the way it looked on the morning news, however when it hit, you all of a sudden missed the warm summer heat.

The only source of warmth I had in the cool was radiating from the beauty standing in front of me.

I was seventeen, and she was sixteen; there was no doubt about that. As I leaned down to her ear and recited one of the most romantic poems I knew she couldn't help the blush. I was the salt to her pepper, the bread to her butter, the sugar to her spice. We made the perfect couple.

She spoke every word with an affection which would make my hands go numb. I love you, was the only string of words I wanted to hear in the moment. I love you, was the message of bells that rang in my ears, as I had become one of hers to cherish.

We looked into each other's eyes, our heads at the same level. Her eyes were blue like the ocean; they were iridescent and flecked with every shade of blue which emphasised on her beauty. From the pressure of her hands, I could tell she was just as nervous as I was.

I leaned in, so close I could smell the floweriest scent of her perfume which I knew I would never forget. My lips reached her jaw, tracing the lines of her ear to her collarbone. Her skin was so soft it reminded me of silk or at that particular moment, fairy floss from a summer fair.

I couldn't stop my heart from pounding in my chest. My blood flowed rapidly in my cheeks, making my face go red. I lifted my hands out of hers and put them down at her waist while pulling her closer to my chest. She put her hands up to my shoulders, where she entwined them with my dark hair. I was hers, she was mine, and so the dish ran away with the spoon.

I blinked, as the once happy thoughts faded from my mind. A sharp beeping noise which I recognised as a heart rate monitor ringing in my ears. Slowly and ever so painfully beeping at a weak and merely one beep per second. Nurses and doctors are rushing around me shouting things like,

"She's fading" and "We're losing her".

I am holding her hand, begging her to stay. Once the first tear broke loose, the rest followed in an unbroken stream of emotion. She was softly trying to convince to me that it would be okay. As I kneeled next to the cold Hospital stretcher, I watched as the light faded out of her once beautiful eyes. Her hands growing cold and stone like in my gasp.

Every second I shared with her passed across my mind. All my regrets about the times I didn't go see her when I could have come jumping out at me.

Never again would I see the happy, giggly girl I once knew. Never again would I get to see the unimaginable beauty that I once took hand in hand in the moonlight.I could not comprehend that she was leaving, and that this wasn't all just some sick minded joke.

The beeping noise echoing throughout the room fell silent,

"I Love You" she whispered,

And just like that,

She was gone.