Light: Exploits, Book II.

Part 20. Strength Beyond Suffering.

I was walking in the cool, pre-dawn light of the Tower. The Traveller, it's bulbous size and gleaming frame casting shapes to dance in the air.
I breathed deep as I made me way to The Wall.
I was walking along the quiet garrisons. Saw a few Titans and Hunters, all who saw me and gave their respects to me.
I was by no means the strongest Guardian in The City. But my own achievements are known among other Guardians.
I walked along a stretch of the Wall, until I found a quiet place, away from the patrols so I wouldn't be disturbed very often.
I was staring out at the snow laden fields of The Cosmodrome, seeming innocent in the pale blue light of night.
It wasn't long before my Ghost appeared before me.
Guardian, how are you this evening? It asks, it's robotic and artificial voice taking on a genuine, heartfelt tone.
My Ghost and I rarely spoke, but when I did, he was there for me when I thought no one else was.
I'm... I start, I'm faring, Little Light. I say, with defeat in my voice.
It peered into my eyes with its own, beeping and chirping softly.
I deeply regret what had happened, Guardian, it says.
As do I, I reply, sinking into my seat. I closed my eyes, feeling a tear creep through.
I remember, when we were on Venus.
How afraid I was to be around another soul.
My sheer and insurmountable anxiety and disdain, for myself.
And Rei, a perfect stranger.
No connection to me whatsoever.
She came to care for me. Love me.
And I did the same.
I remember her voice.
She begged me.
Pleaded for me; end her life.
The most difficult thing I could have ever done.
I had the sword to remind me.
I was shaken from my thoughts by my Ghost saying, Priest and Farah are on their way.
I was just about to tell my Ghost to tell them I wanted privacy, but I heard Priest's boots before I got the chance.
I was in the middle of standing up, when I felt Priest's arms wrap around me and lift me up.
He squeezed and held me for a moment, and I could feel his heartbeat in his chest.
I gave in; what could I do.
If I resisted he'd have broken me it two.
You scared me, he said lowly.
I'd hate it if I actually died then, I reply softly. Only because I know you'd follow me into the Darkness if you knew it may end up with me alive.
He put me down, and before I could straighten my robe, Farah was fast pushing herself into my embrace.
Her metal skin was cool against my cheek, and she hugged me tightly.
I'm so sorry, she whispered.
I was tempted to give some half-hearted assurance, but the words died before I got the chance.
I simply sunk into her embrace.
I was stirred by the sound of approaching footsteps.
I looked beyond Priest and saw Cayde, Ikora and Zavala all walking toward us.
This was quite a sight, to be sure. It's not everyday that the Vanguard address Guardians personally.
Farah, Cayde says. Cmon and take a walk with me; there's something we should discuss. He says, but his face holds a confident grin.
Farah peers at me, but I urge her along. We'll catch up, I whisper.
She nods and follows after Cayde, leaving Priest and I to look at Zavala and Ikora.
What's this about? I ask.
About what you saw; and what you did. Zavala says.
And what's that? I ask.
We all knew.
I knew my Ghost fed them all of our data.
It's high time Priest has joined the Sunbreakers. Zavala says confidently.
Priest looks at me with intrigue, and I nod him along.
He and Zavala are returning to the Vanguard Hall, leaving Ikora and I in the chilly morning.
She and I merely look at one another; I'm as unsure about what she intends to say as she is of how I will react, no doubt.
I'd offer you training for what you did on Neptune, she starts, but you most likely have other things on your mind.
I balled my fists tight, my gloves straining.
Too fresh a wound, Ikora, I scold softly, sitting down.
I have something else in mind for you, she said.
I maintained my gaze outward, until I heard the distinct sound of a rifle click.
I peered back, and saw Ikora load a fresh magazine into a rifle, but it looked like no rifle.
Not even a weapon.
It looked more like a macabre decoration; what looked like a bird skull at the end of wicked, twisted metal.
She handed it to me, and I was hesitant to take it.
What is it? I ask.
Something that will turn the tide, she said.
A weapon made by a Guardian, for a Guardian.
I stood up, and reached slowly for the weapon.
Before I could take it, however, I looked at Ikora again.
What... Is it? I ask again.
She smiled, and still held the weapon.
Bad Juju, she replies.
My eyes widened in disbelief and terror.
Toland's own rifle; of his own design.
Whispers of terrible darkness, are said to echo from the weapons very metal.
But that's nothing compared to what it may well reveal to its user.
One of Light, can wield even the Darkest things, Guardian, Ikora said softly.
You did what was necessary; you are no murderer, she says. But, I am very, deeply sorry.
I felt everything stand still before me.
I wonder, if sometime far past, beyond this life, when I was "Not a Guardian"... I was faced with a choice like this.
For what Ikora was offering to me was, to put in the simplest terms, freedom.
By offering me a tool so deeply connected to The Darkness was... Maddening.
Also, beyond crafty.
Letting it creep, and speak from within.
Learning its ways.
To kill it; was the hope.
But, sometimes, the whispers grow loud.
Too loud.
Stories of Warlocks, once great tacticians and masters of their craft.
Driven insane by what this weapon offered.
A way to kill, yes.
But far more than anything you point it at.
My fingers twitched as they hovered over the weapon grip.
It looked like it was fitted perfectly.
Like the weapon was... Molding itself.
To fit like it was natural.
Like it was natural, to just... kill.
I shuddered softly as I wrapped my fingers around the grip.
It began to temp my mind; my Light.
But I fended off its screams with ground shaking, echoing whispers.
Necessity.
Never by choice.
I stood tall and breathed deep, and sling the rifle on my back with Dark-Drinker.
I felt the Light.
The Traveller spoke through me still.
I was no tool of destruction; no instrument of war.
I was a Guardian.
I stand strong against the Darkness.
I will walk the Dark.
And from within it, I bloom Light.
Master, Ikora said.
I blinked softly in surprise.
I dub thee, she said with a smile.
I gave a small bow, but Ikora urged me to stand again.
I saw down the wall, and Zavalla was trailing ahead of Priest, whose body was awash in fire like the sun. He held the hammer he said Rei used against all those Hive.
I assumed he must have had some natural affinity with the Solar Light, and he needed only encouragement.
I felt his heat as he drew closer.
Nice trick, I chuckle.
Not as nice as what you can do, trust me, he says, referring to what Ikora dubbed, Stormtrance.
We all heard clapping, and turned to see Cayde striding toward us.
You guys wanna hear something cool? He said in his calm, yet quick voice.
We all remained silent.
So, when Farah died, on Neptune, almost for real, and Dylan went and used his Void Light to un-squash her Ghost? And she had some Void Light left over? He said, his eyes lazily darting between all of our own.
Well, check out what she can do with it, he says and steps to the side, and we all see Farah.
She raises her hands, and, from thin air, draws a bow made of purple fire.
I could tell immediately that it was Void Light.
Who'd have thought that would have been a good idea, I said softly.
Well I'm sure as shit glad you tried, Farah said as she walks toward us, holding her new weapon.
Hunters call this trick Nightstalker. You'll learn as you go, Cayde said to her in a newly soft tone as she walked by.
She stepped up next to Priest and I, and Ikora, Cayde and Zavalla all stepped back and took us in.
We've also deemed it acceptable to allow you beyond conventional boundaries, Zavalla said.
The data, while disturbing, will prove undeniably useful in the event of this new Taken threat, he said, referring to the events that happened shortly after we left for Neptune.
So the Vanguard will allow you to make excursions like the one to Neptune. Your Light is strong, and we know you will provide us with far more.
And with that, they all gave us their leave.
We were essentially given freedom to go anywhere.
And do anything.
Any legends we'd heard at bars in the City.
Any stories we'd found in ancient Hive tombs.
We were deemed strong enough, to face anything.
Alone, perhaps not.
But, together, with a bond tighter than family.
More trusting than blood.
We were Guardians.
We Guard, one another.
I may have lost my Guardians, at one time.
But, I'll remember their names.
Honor, their sacrifices.
I took one last look at The Traveller.
What're we gonna do now? Farah asked.
I grinned softly, and saw light bounce off of The Traveller.
Now... We travel. I said softly.