I admire you.
I never thought that I will love you as much as I do right now.
I never thought that I will be needing you this bad that it hurts my heart not seeing you around.
Please, I need you here. I need you now.
***
I still remember the day when we first met. It was so wonderful. You came into my life in that beautiful day, while the leaves of the trees are falling.
I never thought that I will love someone like you. Someone who was with me since we were 8. Yes, it's really possible but you were my bestfriend.
Highschool, you were leaving. You said that everything will be fine. We will stay the same. That was so painful. I never felt so low as I am back then. It feels like a part of me died.
College. Another morning came. I am still longing for the time that you will come back, and by then. I will surely be able to tell you how much I feel for you.
Graduation came. That was the day I will never forget. I saw you right infront of the crowd. You were smiling and crying while looking at me. I felt like my heart will explode due to the happiness I am feeling.
You came back and started a new life with me. Still I can't tell you my feelings. I'm badly insane and eager to tell you.
Your birthday came. I was there but you never notice me. I thought that was just a nightmare but then it's true. You have someone else that you love and you introduces him to your family.
I never got the chance to talk to you. I never get the chance to tell you my feelings for you.
I tried to moved on by staying away from you. That's why I moved away to other country.
I thought everything will be fine until another challange took place. I was diagnosed with stage 3 cancer. I felt like my world just fall into it's end.
Now, I am here. Alone in the hospital. I can't think of anything but you. I want you here. I want you with me. I need you. Please be here.
I love you.
Tonight, I've fallen and I can't get up.
I need your loving arms to come and pick me up.
And every night I miss you...
"Please, come back to me. I'm sorry for not telling you. I'm sorry. I love you."
I'm sorry, but I guess... this is goodbye.
My love is endless.
Even if I felt LOVELESS.
