Shaq drops me off in his 1969 low-rider. The car is barely even functioning now, but it's better than nothing. I open the net door for my townhouse and it squeaks loudly. I have to fix that, I think to myself. Just like so many other things in this neighborhood. Christian is sitting on the couch, staring at the wall. I decide tell him what happened at the diner, and he doesn't seem too happy about it.
"What?!I don't even understand, man! Those bills woulda helped so much but you... why won't you just put down your damn pride for just a moment, and let the community pay-"
"Chris, stop it. I've done told you so many time already that I do NOT want to go around asking for money like some beggar! I've come along way too far to go back!" Chris sighs and shakes his head. Creases form on his forehead. I fold my arms and lean against the wall.
"I know what I'm doing Chris. Don't worry. Everything...everything will be fine, you'll see!"
"Whatever girl. Look, you're putting a child's life at risk, a child!"
"Don't you think I know that?! I will handle it, OK? And I will not take money from people who I know will just ask me for favors I can't do in return-"
"They not like that-"
"They ALL are. They're humans, Chris. You are too."
He opens his mouth to say something but stops short when we heard that sweet little voice. "Deedee? Is everything OK?"
I flash a glare at Chris. It was definitely because of our arguing that he started that woke my little angel up. He shrugs and puts his hands up, excusing himself from the blame. I turn around and feel my face glow with love, true love. I kneel down with my arms open.
"Darling come here, of course everything's OK! I'm sorry we woke you up sweetheart!"
Denzal rubs his beautiful dark brown eyes and stumbles over into my hug and wraps his arms around my neck. "I had a dream about Mommy again. She was crying and saying it was too early. What did she mean by too early Deedee?" I choke back on a sob and say, "God was sending her to bed early because she needs her rest, just like you do. Go back to bed now sweetie, you have school tomorrow." I pull his arms away from me gently and pat his back lightly as he walks back into his room. I turn around to face Chris again, and he's now standing there with his hands in his pockets, heartbroken. After a few uneasy seconds, he finally asks,
"Are you willing to risk his life over your pride?"
I run my hands through my hair. "If all else fails, I'll take the money,ok?"
"Diana what if it's too late by then?"
"Chris, it's late. I have to work tomorrow-"
"Work,work,work. What good does it do that you're working, huh? You work all the damn time and I see no difference in the way that you all are living! You still here, in the ghettos, whether you like the name or not, D this is where you still are. Man, you're supposed to do better than us! Even better than Bonnie! Instead you working yo ass of at Hollywood and you still wearin' baggy, old pants and a t-shirt like the rest of us-"
"Shh! Quiet down!"
He scoffs angrily. "As your brother, Diana, break the contract. The street is willing to help you!" "I can't. You know I can't." "Fine.Whatever man, I tried.Moms not gonna be happy about this." I'm on the verge to say, 'She's not my mother' but I bite my tongue. She's close enough, isn't she?
Chris leaves, but it still doesn't break the tension in the small living room. I turn the knob on the TV and I sit down on the worn out couch, throwing my head back against the cushions. I start to think over my day as I watch the music channel. I smirk. It's a new decade and I still own a colorless TV. The show on TV shows some group of young, African American boys singing Want You Back. I sit up once I see the small one in the purple hat. I frown.
He looks familiar.
My mind flashes back to the diner and I shake my head, laughing a bitter laugh. A Hollywood boy, here in the streets? Granted, a couple of celebrities do visit every now and then, but at least they weren't brainwashed by those Plastics. Nah, that boy in the diner was just another boy. A rich one at it too. I should've kept the money. But the look on the old man's face made me happy for awhile. I put my face in my hands and breathe in sharply. One regret after another. I get up slowly and turn the TV off and head into Denzal's room. I peer underneath his covers and he's sleeping soundlessly like the beautiful angel he is. "I'll do everything I can, honey. You will not leave me like this. You have a bright future ahead child, I promise." I whisper into his ear.
I kiss his head lightly when I feel this small indent underneath my lips. I frown and feel around his head.
Bruises.
It's already starting.
